Once Upon A Tiara. Carrie Alexander

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СКАЧАТЬ the lavatory with her backside. “I can wipe my bottom by myself, too.”

      He nearly choked, recovering only as the door was swinging shut. “There’s a limit to my servitude, Princess,” he called after her, hoping for her Tinkerbell laugh. She did not disappoint. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, making a small gesture of triumph with his clenched fists. He might not make her swoon, but at least he could make her laugh.

      He cracked an eye open. Oops. At the other end of the hallway, Grundy and Wilhelm were peering from the office door. Simon shrugged somewhat sheepishly and thrust his hands in his pockets. The party was a disaster and the museum’s funds were at serious risk. Didn’t matter.

      One laugh from the princess and he felt like a million bucks.

      Unfortunately, Simon couldn’t quite sustain his exhilaration when Lili still hadn’t emerged thirteen minutes later—he knew the time exactly because he’d been checking his watch. He paced the width of the corridor, counting under his breath. Another three minutes went by, excruciatingly slowly. Neither Grundy nor Wilhelm had budged. In fact, they were beginning to glare, as if he’d done something to delay the princess.

      He went to the door and knocked. “Princess?”

      No answer.

      He put his ear to it. Silence—not even running water. The princess’s attendants were coming toward him now, craning their necks to hear. “Princess Lili?” he called, pushing the door open an inch. “Are you doing okay?”

      There came a thud, then a crash. A female grunt. “Fiddlesticks!”

      “Lili?” Simon burst into the room, followed by Wilhelm and Grundy. His first shocking sight of the princess sent him skidding to a stop, with the other two piling up behind him.

      Mrs. Grundy pushed by. “Princess, what have you done now?”

      “I think my foot is stuck,” Lili said. She was sprawled on the tile floor with her tight skirt rucked up around her hips, showing a good portion of a rounded, wriggling, panty-clad backside. One foot was trapped in a swivel-lid trash can, which lay on its side, a number of crumpled tissues spewing from its maw.

      “Shall I call an ambulance?” Wilhelm said.

      “Heavens, no!” Lili stopped wriggling and lifted her head and shoulders off the floor, her hands splayed on the tiles. She looked up at them with big, dark, glistening eyes, like an innocent baby seal. “Nothing’s broken. Just help me pull my leg out of here, for pity’s sake.”

      Mrs. Grundy knelt awkwardly and tugged Lili’s skirt down a few inches. “However did you…?”

      “It was an accident.”

      Wilhelm crouched, his big hands outspread, hesitating to place them on the exposed royal thigh. He went for the trash can instead, giving it a wrench. Lili winced, twisting partway onto her side. “Ooh! Ouch! Wait!” Her gaze rose to beseech Simon. “Would you? Please? The lid is pinching the back of my thigh.”

      “All right,” he said, kneeling beside her. He examined the…uh, situation. Grundy huffed at the insult, hurriedly unbuttoning her jacket. She threw it across Lili’s lower half.

      Simon put his hand on her leg—on top of the scratchy tweed covering. Somehow, the princess had managed to insert her leg all the way down inside the can, but they should be able to maneuver it out easily enough. “Another fine predicament you’ve gotten us into,” he murmured to distract them all as he slid his hand beneath the jacket. Lili tensed as he reached around her warm thigh, his fingers gently probing. He pushed his flattened hand between her thigh and the lid, easing its bite on her tender flesh.

      She sighed with relief. “That’s better.”

      He smiled at her. “Mrs. Grundy? Could you reach in here and push the lid down to make more room? I’m sure I’ll be able to help Lili pull her leg free if we have another inch of space.”

      Grundy pinched her lips tight and reached down. While the bodyguard held the can steady, Simon gripped Lili’s leg and slowly eased it out, trying not to look as she parted her thighs even wider to squirm free.

      Grundy let go and the lid snapped back in place. She and the bodyguard were immediately at the princess’s side, helping her to her feet. Simon saw that Lili had lost both shoes, so he set the can on end and fished inside. No shoes.

      He spotted them on a ledge by the sink. Odd. He retrieved them, wondering why she’d taken them off in the first place. “Your slippers, Cinderella.”

      Grundy snatched the shoes away. “Let me help you into them, Princess.” She knelt.

      Lili murmured her thanks, balancing herself with one hand on Wilhelm’s arm as she lifted her feet for Grundy. She looked at Simon. She was blushing. “I apologize, Mr. Tremayne. I didn’t intend to destroy your washroom. I was—” Her eyes flitted. “Well, you see, I was…”

      “No explanations necessary,” Simon put in. He’d seen the open window, high up on the wall. “My museum is your museum.”

      “You’re very understanding.”

      “I make special allowances for royalty.”

      She had the grace to look abashed. “It seems that I demand plenty. I will try to be on my best behavior tomorrow.”

      He inclined his head. “We’re happy to have you on any behavior, Your Serene Highness.”

      Her eyes rolled. “Oh, please. We’re definitely past that stuck-up claptrap. If you can’t remember to call me Lili, I won’t be able to eat hot dogs with you.”

      “Then it’s a date?” he said quickly, refraining from adding an “Again?”

      Lili tilted her tousled head. “Why not?”

      Grundy cleared her throat as she stood. “What about the schedule?”

      “The shedjul will survive, Amelia.” Lili stamped her newly shod feet, intercepting Simon’s amused glance. “You may be a prince of a guy, Mr. Tremayne, but I’m not allowed to surrender my feet to just anyone.”

      He chuckled. A prince? Impossible. He’d always been the frog.

      Mrs. Grundy took Lili’s arm, not unlike the way Henry Russell had taken Jana Vargas’s. “Enough of that, Princess. We really must be on our way.”

      “Yes, we must.” Lili cast a lingering parting glance at Simon. “See you soon?”

      He swallowed. “Indubitably.”

      She stopped, pulling the key from an inside pocket of her short pink jacket. “I almost forgot.”

      He took it, surprised that she still possessed it. Maybe his suspicions were wrong?

      Had she fallen into the trash on her way out the window, or on the way in? Either way, he’d better go and find the chief. Henry should be told immediately that it was very possible the princess of Grunberg had been conspiring with a pickpocketing suspect. Simon could think of no other reason for Lili to have deliberately taken her shoes off and climbed through the window. Since she still had the key, she СКАЧАТЬ