Special Ops Rendezvous. Karen Anders

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СКАЧАТЬ was trying not to fool herself. She knew he was a stranger, but that kiss...she’d melted into him, disappeared inside him and had been more with him than she’d ever been with anyone in her life. Right or wrong, the feelings were there and they were real.

      She just wanted to bury her face in the curve of his neck and start all over again. She didn’t get embarrassed about her feelings like other women, and she sure as hell didn’t get them hurt often. She was methodical about who she chose to date.

      Sam...was an American hero, a military man. Normally that would suit her. Gone a good bit of the time was okay in her book, but when she thought about Sam going anywhere, she didn’t like that idea.

      He stood and moved away from her as if he didn’t trust himself. “I’m so messed up, Olivia. So messed up. I don’t even know if I’ll ever be right again. Normal. If I am, it’s back to Special Forces for me. Uncle Sam is all I really know.”

      “In the short time that I’ve known you, you’ve never sounded so unsure about anything.”

      He rubbed his hand over that short sexy hair, and Olivia just wanted to get her hands on him again.

      “I don’t really know you, but it must be a trait that runs in your family, because I’m close to spilling my guts and I’m not used to that. I barely talk to my family. In Special Forces showing any weakness is unacceptable. But I can’t go back to my unit until I figure out what happened to me.”

      “Sam,” she said, rising and going over to him. “If you need someone to talk to, you can talk to me. I won’t ever betray your trust. It has to be ironclad if we’re going to weather all this.”

      He backed away from her and ran his hand over his head again. That was fear she saw in his eyes, and she suspected that he’d had plenty of that in the six months he’d been back in Raleigh. She figured he was tired, too. The kind of tired you didn’t get from one difficult day. Those nightmares must be awful if the look on his face when he had woken on the table was any indication.

      “Talk to me.”

      She shut up then, deciding to let him find his own way into the conversation they both knew they had to have.

      He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes, his breathing shallow. She was a bit worried he might hyperventilate, but she held her tongue and let him work through it in his head. Men like Sam powered through fear, and the courage it must have taken for him to seek out her brother humbled Olivia.

      He brought his head down and opened his eyes, then settled back a bit more. He released a shaky breath, his eyes dark and tormented. He tried to speak, but his voice gave out on him. His face contorted in an agony of emotion. Finally he said, “Do I feel freaked out because your brother is dead?” in a hushed voice. “Yes. I have a tremendous amount of guilt about it. And that’s bad enough, but he can’t help me anymore. And, Olivia, I need that help. I’ve got to unlock what’s inside my head. That’s where the answers are, but it’s just blank. Like a black wall.”

      As she watched him, an enormous need unfolded in her. A need to comfort him, to assure him, a need to simply wrap her arms around him to let him know he wasn’t alone. But she sensed he wasn’t open to that right now, the muscles along his bristled jaw tensing. “Then we should find someone else to help you.”

      He shook his head, his eyes stark. “I can’t....” Folding his arms across his chest, he didn’t move for the longest time; then he let his breath go in a heavy sigh and rubbed his eyes, swallowing hard. Finally he spoke, his voice gruff. “I can’t trust that what I might have said to your brother somehow got him dead. I can’t see another psychologist and put anyone else in danger. I don’t even think you should be involved.”

      She shifted and looked directly at him even as he gave her an exasperated look. “We’ve already discussed that and I’m not changing my mind about that, Sam. Especially now.”

      Letting his breath go in a ragged sigh, he pushed off the wall and said, “Why? Because you feel sorry for me? Olivia, I can take care of myself.

      “I don’t doubt that, Sam.” He just stared at her with the look of annoyance on his face. “I don’t. I understand that this is risky and dangerous, but I’m not leaving you. I think you’re under surveillance.”

      “Why didn’t you tell me this last night?”

      “Because you’d had enough last night and I can’t be sure. It’s a gut feeling, but I haven’t been able to pinpoint who might be watching you. I took a lot of footage when I was following you. I just haven’t had a chance to look at it all. Whoever they are, they’re pros, slippery and elusive, very good at what they do.”

      “I must be really off my game if you were following me and another set of people.” He sounded so weary. “I’ve had this prickly sensation ever since I got home. Where is this footage?”

      “In my camera at my apartment. We can pick it up tomorrow when I get my things.”

      He nodded. “That’s at least something.”

      “We should get some sleep, Sam. We have a lot going on in the next few days.”

      He nodded and they headed toward the back of the house. As she drew closer to him, she noted the compressed lines around his mouth and the tension in his body. She hated the thought that while she would sleep well, there was no guarantee that Sam would. Was that what was causing him this tension or was it her and what had happened between them in the living room? She touched his arm and he hesitated. “We’ll figure it out, Sam. We’ll work at it until we do. Try to rest if you can. We can take...everything slow.”

      He turned to look at her, and a genuine smile released some of the strain on his face. “Babe, if we ever decide that we want to move forward with what happened on the couch, it won’t be slow. Believe me, it was the best part about this whole screwed-up situation we’re in.”

      Unable to drag her eyes away, she stared at him, her heart fluttering, an unexpected longing clogging her chest.

      The men of her past faded away. Right now there was no one but Sam. He had that certain aura about him, the stamp of unadulterated masculinity, of sexual intensity, that somehow magnified his physical strength. But it wasn’t his looks or his rugged body that made him stand out in the crowd. It was his quiet assurance in spite of his fears and doubts. He was a man very secure in his own masculinity, whose strength of character had shaped and molded his life. There were no half measures in him. He handled everything all the way.

      “I can see why John was so keen on you and so adamant that you deserved the attention. And as for what happened on the couch...let me say you know what you’re doing very well in that respect.”

      He leaned down and whispered softly, “You’d better get inside your room, babe, before I forget why I stopped kissing you in the first place.”

      “You like giving out those orders, don’t you, Captain?”

      “Hup to it and march, Olivia.”

      “The more I get to know you, the more I like the man you are.”

      They shared a grin before she did as she was told, not because she wanted to, but because at this moment it was prudent. Would it always be so? No, she didn’t think so. The attraction between them was volatile and she wasn’t sure whether, СКАЧАТЬ