One Night Of Consequences Collection. Annie West

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СКАЧАТЬ sat so perfectly still she wasn’t even breathing—she didn’t know what to say. It was clear that he blamed himself for their accident and she wasn’t sure words alone would be sufficient to ever relieve his guilt. And in a way she understood how he felt because she was sure if their situations were reversed she’d feel just as awful as he did about it. But she also knew that he had to deal with his guilt and let it go because it really hadn’t been his fault.

      She remembered what he’d said to her on her first night at the palace about how his parents had dragged him and his sister through their marital problems and suddenly she saw him as the eldest child who had been torn between his love and loyalty to both parents and who was damned if he did and damned if he didn’t. At least in her own situation she’d had her mother’s unconditional love. Nadir had only had his brother...and his sister, who he no doubt felt he had to protect and whose life he felt he had cut short, and she could only imagine how horrible he must feel.

      Wanting to at least close the physical distance between them, she went to stand beside him. She stared at his austere profile and she knew she had tears in her eyes because she just felt for him so much and wanted to rip the pain from his body with her bare hands.

      ‘Afterwards my father refused to give either one of them an honourable funeral.’

      Imogen’s brow scrunched as she absorbed that piece of information. She shook her head. ‘Why not?’

      Nadir sucked in a deep breath and she knew he was containing his emotions and locking them down tight. ‘He said that they had dishonoured and disrespected him and so to this day they don’t have headstones on their graves.’

      Without thinking, she reached out and covered the hand he rested on the windowsill with her own. His was much larger than hers and sprinkled with dark hair that stroked across her senses. It also felt cold. ‘Was that why you left Bakaan when you were fifteen?’

      ‘Yes.’ He watched her fingers lightly stroke over the back of his knuckles. ‘We argued about it and because I had challenged him once too often he disowned me so I left.’

      And closed himself off from everyone ever since. ‘Nadir, you know you can’t blame yourself for what happened. You were only a child.’

      He carefully shifted his hand out from underneath hers. ‘I was fifteen. Old enough to know better,’ he said bitterly.

      ‘No, not old enough to know better,’ she denied hotly and she knew that first-hand because at fifteen she had witnessed her father’s affair with another woman and she’d had no idea what to do about it. In the end she hadn’t told her mother because she’d known it would break her heart but her father assumed that she had and it had led to him leaving anyway.

      He moved away from her and she heard the give of the cushions as he dropped back onto the sofa.

      ‘I don’t even know why I told you any of that so please if you’re going to patronise me by trying to make me feel better then don’t. Nothing will ever do that.’

      Imogen crossed to stand behind the opposite sofa and gripped the backrest. ‘I’m not being patronising, Nadir, but it’s not rational to think that you caused their deaths.’

      ‘I was a selfish idiot.’

      ‘You were a normal teenager who was trying to keep his world intact.’

      ‘Imogen—’

      ‘No, I’m serious. I know you’re hurting over this but how long are you going to punish yourself for the actions of a man who was an adult and should have behaved better?’

      ‘You don’t understand—I knew he would go after them.’ His voice sounded as if it was wrenched from a place that was deep and dark.

      Rounding the sofa, Imogen stopped directly in front of him. ‘Nadir, you loved them and it sounds like your loyalty was completely divided. That’s not a nice thing for parents to do to kids of any age.’

      ‘There’s no excuse for selfishness.’

      ‘Maybe it wasn’t you who was the selfish one. Maybe it was your parents.’

      He looked at her as if he’d never contemplated that before and she knew that was probably because instead of processing what had happened he’d just tried to completely forget about it. ‘Did you happen to get counselling at all?’

      Her question brought a surprised bark of laughter. ‘Sure I did. The place was called The Painted Pony.’

      Imogen put her hands on her hips and felt the air between them become charged as his gaze drifted over her. ‘I’m not talking about the strip place you worked at, although I’m sure there were many ladies ready to offer you a shoulder to cry on.’

      ‘Unfortunately, I don’t cry.’

      ‘What a surprise. But, seriously, Nadir. I hate to think that you still blame yourself for something that really wasn’t your fault.’

      ‘And I hate to think that we’re going to waste a whole evening while Nadeena is asleep rehashing an event that is best forgotten.’

      Deciding to ignore that, she continued as if he hadn’t spoken. ‘Tell me this,’ she began quietly. ‘If this was Nadeena and she had made a mistake like the one you feel you made would you want her to punish herself for it for ever?’

      He pushed himself up from the sofa and paced away from her, holding himself rigid. ‘That’s unfair.’

      The fact that he’d even shared this side of himself with her made Imogen glow. It meant that he trusted her. And maybe it was time for her to start trusting him a little as well. ‘Maybe you’re the one who is being unfair. To yourself.’

      Without thinking too much about it, she went to him and wrapped her arms around his broad back.

      He stiffened but didn’t move away from her and she could feel the heat of his body through the thin cotton of his dish-dasha. ‘I think your mother and sister want you to be happy, don’t you?’

      He made a low sound in his throat that sounded like it came from a wounded animal and her heart felt as if it had been squeezed by a giant fist.

      Acting purely on instinct, she ran her hands across his broad shoulders and pressed herself closer. He didn’t move a muscle but she knew she’d got to him because his breathing quickened just a little. Circling around, she stopped directly in front of him and smoothed her hands over his chest.

      Emboldened by the fierce glitter in his eyes, she reached up and pulled his head down to hers. He yielded but she knew his mind was still in another place. A bad place.

      About to pull back and give him time, she groaned with pleasure as he plunged his hands into her hair and took her mouth in a hungry kiss that completely immobilised her. Dazed at the swift rise of arousal, she pulled at his robe and moaned in frustration when she could find no way into it. ‘These things are not fashioned for easy access, are they?’ she complained.

      Nadir growled and reefed the garment over his head and she heard one of the seams give in his haste to get it off.

      Trembling with excitement, Imogen dug her fingers into the waistband of the cotton СКАЧАТЬ