The Hidden Women. Kerry Barrett

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      ‘So he was thinking about you after all.’

      ‘I think that makes it worse,’ Jack said. ‘Because he could have just rung, you know? And I’m doing okay, in my career. I didn’t need his money – but I needed a dad.’

      I breathed out. This was so sad. I hoped he’d be as honest with the camera crew when they filmed his story – it would make a great episode.

      ‘And you want to know more about his family now?’

      ‘I know lots about my Caribbean side. I know everything. I’ve met everyone. I know the recent history and I know further back – the murky bits. The nasty, horrible, slavery bits.’

      I nodded again.

      ‘And I’m really aware that I can only go so far back on that side of my family. We will never be able to go much further than a few generations because no one kept records. I don’t know where we came from, or what my ancestors did, and I will never be able to find out.’

      ‘So now you’re filling the gap on the other side instead?’ I said, understanding now where his drive to discover his family came from.

      ‘That’s the plan.’ He gave me a little sheepish smile. ‘Sorry to be so demanding.’

      I smiled back at him and for a second we stayed that way, eyes locked, smiling at each other, until I dropped my gaze. What was I doing?

      ‘I don’t mind at all,’ I said honestly. ‘Happy to help.’

      ‘Did you find out anything about your own family mystery?’

      I didn’t understand what he was talking about. Did he mean Greg? I knew where he was. I looked at him blankly. ‘What mystery?’

      ‘Your Lilian Miles,’ he said.

      ‘Oh, Lilian. No, not really. I don’t think there’s anything mysterious about it all …’

      ‘But?’

      ‘But there was a look between my parents, when I mentioned what I’d found.’

      Jack sat up a bit straighter. ‘And?’ he said.

      ‘And my dad turned up here and asked me to research her some more.’

      ‘Interesting,’ said Jack, raising his eyebrows.

      ‘I chatted about it with my sister …’

      ‘You’ve got a sister?’

      ‘I’ve got two,’ I said, finding the way his mind darted between subjects a bit disconcerting. Maybe he had drunk too much coffee. ‘And a brother.’

      ‘Awesome,’ Jack said. ‘So what did your sister say?’

      ‘She said I should ask my great-aunt what she did during the war and whether this Lilian Miles is her.’

      ‘Seems reasonable enough.’

      ‘I suggested that to Dad,’ I went on.

      ‘And what did he say?’

      I frowned. ‘He didn’t really say anything because we were interrupted. He was very keen for me to research her, though. I don’t understand why.’

      ‘I understand,’ Jack said.

      I stared at him. ‘You do?’

      ‘I understand what it’s like not to know about part of your family,’ he explained. ‘Maybe your dad feels the same.’

      ‘Perhaps,’ I said, doubtfully. ‘But he knows all about Lil. She even lived with us for a while. She’s hardly an enigma.’

      Jack grinned. ‘But you don’t know about her war.’

      ‘Well, no …’

      ‘So she is an enigma. At least part of her life is.’

      I shook my head, feeling like he’d just backed me into a corner. ‘Dad was hiding something,’ I said thoughtfully, almost to myself. ‘It was like he didn’t want to tell me the real reason he was so keen.’

      ‘You have to find out more,’ Jack said.

      Eagerly, he took my hand and I felt a jolt like the electric shocks I always got off the dodgy lift buttons in the office. Surprised, I pulled my hand away and he looked embarrassed.

      ‘Sorry,’ he said. ‘I shouldn’t have done that.’

      ‘No, don’t apologise,’ I blustered. ‘I just got an electric shock is all.’

      He smiled at me. ‘Sorry,’ he said again. ‘Next time I take your hand, I’ll warn you in advance so you can earth yourself.’

      ‘Next time,’ I said, sounding robotic and as though I didn’t really understand the words, like Eleven from Stranger Things.

      We smiled at each other and I felt myself flush.

      ‘So, yeah,’ I said briskly, to break the awkward moment. ‘Dad wants me to look at the service records but I explained I’m not allowed. Fliss is very strict about us not researching our own family history at work.’

      ‘Use my research,’ Jack said.

      ‘I beg your pardon?’

      ‘Use my family as a cover. Find Frank Jones in the ATA and look up Lil while you’re at it.’

      ‘I really don’t think that’s a good idea,’ I said. ‘It’s too risky. We can all see each other’s searches. What if someone twigs I’m looking up my family? I can’t lose my job.’

      Jack shrugged. ‘Just an idea,’ he said. ‘No need to decide now. Why not think about it?’

      I smiled despite my misgivings. ‘Okay, then,’ I said. ‘I’ll think about it. But for now, I’m just going to talk to Lil.’

      Jack grinned again. His smile was infectious.

      ‘Great,’ he said. ‘Let me know how you get on.’

       Chapter 9

      I thought about how best to approach the subject with Lil all weekend. Several times I picked up the phone to speak to her in her care home down in Surrey, then changed my mind. I’d go and see her in person, I thought. And anyway, I didn’t know for sure yet that she was the Lilian Miles on the ATA list. The only way to find out was to double-check the service record – under the cover of checking Frank Jones of course. If – and it was a big if – I decided to go down that road, I couldn’t do it until I was back at work on Monday and had access to all the databases.

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