Anything for His Son. Rita Herron

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СКАЧАТЬ his hand up her neck, caught the back of her head with his palm and leaned toward her. Her mouth was only inches away. He desperately wanted to kiss her. Feel her pulse throb beneath his touch. Make her forget wanting any man except him. “You don’t have to be lonely, Bec.”

      Her eyes misted. “That’s not fair, Ethan. You know I care about you. I always will. You’re Jesse’s father—”

      “Is that all I am to you now?”

      She licked her lips, drawing his attention to the curve of her mouth. The one he wanted to taste again.

      “No, of course not. We share a past. We…loved each other once.”

      Once? The word triggered a spasm of pain in his chest. She didn’t love him anymore….

      “But our marriage wasn’t working, Ethan, and you know it.” Her voice grew stronger. “I never meant to hurt you, and I know you didn’t want to hurt me. It… Our lives just got in the way.”

      “And your life won’t get in the way with this stockbroker?”

      “I don’t know,” she said. “But it’s time to try.”

      He heard the honesty in her answer, and a pang of guilt assaulted him. He wanted her to be happy. “I never meant to neglect you,” he said softly.

      “I know.” She pressed a hand to his cheek. “But we have to think of Jesse. Closure will be good for all of us.”

      His throat thickened. How could a broken family be good for their son?

      Despair thickened his throat. He’d vowed to be a better father than his old man, a better husband. But he’d failed at both. “I am thinking of Jesse. He’s my son, Rebecca. He deserves two parents.”

      “You’ll always be his father, Ethan. You can see him whenever you want. That isn’t going to change.”

      Did she really believe that another man in the picture wouldn’t alter things?

      “Let’s face the truth,” she said. “You’re three thousand miles away. Jesse needs a stable male role model.”

      He heard her unspoken words. One who was in his life on a daily basis. God, he was being selfish, wasn’t he? “This man…Jesse likes him?”

      She nodded. “He seems to care about Jesse, too.”

      Her words both soothed him and tore him up inside. Another man was on the verge of replacing him, both in her life and in his son’s, and he couldn’t stop it from happening.

      “We can’t rehash the past,” she said in a voice filled with emotions. “I want you to be happy, Ethan. You are who you are. I realized long ago I had no right to change that, and I wouldn’t want to.”

      And he had no right to hold her back if this man was what she wanted. Not when he hadn’t changed. He still worked ninety hours a week. Still accepted dangerous Eclipse missions. Still thrived on work.

      Hell, he lived for the high and the danger. He didn’t know how to live without it.

      Rebecca deserved better.

      He dropped his hand, let it rest by his side for a minute, hoping to calm his shaking fingers.

      Then he gathered his courage and reached for the pen to sign the papers.

      REBECCA HATED SECOND-GUESSING herself. She hated even more the pain in Ethan’s eyes when she’d admitted her interest in another man. Guilt and affection for Ethan warred with the need to end the meeting as quickly as possible.

      She shouldn’t feel guilty. How often had she seen Ethan the past two years? Even Jesse had been disappointed time and time again when Ethan had been forced to cancel.

      Frank Sullivan was a nice man. A stockbroker who made good money. A man who had expressed interest in Jesse and coached the kid’s baseball team when he had no children of his own. He supported her career and lived close by, so that he could provide more of a stable influence on Jesse. After all, Jesse was growing up. He needed a man in his life. One he could count on.

      One who didn’t disappear for weeks at a time, put his life on the line constantly. One who came home at night.

      “Bec?”

      She spread her hands in her lap. “What is it, Ethan?”

      “Can I see Jesse later?”

      Her heart twisted, and she clutched Ethan’s hand. “Of course you can. Jesse is your son. He loves you.”

      A muscle ticked in his jaw. “I don’t intend to let him forget me.”

      “I know that,” Rebecca said softly. “And I would never let that happen, either.” She squeezed his arm. God, this was harder than she’d imagined. “No one can ever replace you in his life, Ethan.” Or in my heart.

      But she had to give Frank Sullivan a chance.

      “Thank you for saying that.” He rubbed her hand gently. He used to do that, then he’d lift her fingers and kiss them. Then she would melt in his arms.

      She couldn’t let it go that far today, or she’d never be able to sign these divorce papers. And even if they did kiss or make love, their lifestyles wouldn’t change.

      “It wasn’t all bad, was it?” he asked quietly.

      She smiled and shook her head. “No, Ethan. We had some wonderful times, some great memories. But reliving them…it’s just too painful.”

      “The last thing I want is to hurt you,” Ethan said quietly.

      Her gaze met his. “I know that, Ethan.”

      “Right.” He released her hand and scrubbed his through his short military-cut hair. “Well, then, why procrastinate any longer?”

      He handed her the pen and gestured for her to go first. Her insides trembled, but she sat down and zeroed in on the lines where they were supposed to sign their names. How ironic, she thought. After so much love and time together, so many memories and promises, all they had to do to dissolve their marriage and erase the past was scribble their signatures on the dotted line.

      She inhaled a deep breath, and pressed the tip of the pen down, when the door suddenly burst open.

      “Miss Rebecca! Miss Rebecca!” Jesse’s nanny stumbled into the salon, waving her arms, looking harried.

      Rebecca frowned. “What is it, DeeDee?”

      “Miss Rebecca,” DeeDee sobbed. “Oh, my God, my God, my God. It’s Jesse!”

      Rebecca shot to her feet, her heart pounding as she searched behind the woman for her son. “Where is he, DeeDee? What’s happened?”

      Ethan lurched toward DeeDee, grabbed her by the arms and shook her gently. “What’s wrong? Is Jesse hurt? Did he have an accident?”

      DeeDee’s СКАЧАТЬ