Rome. Jay Crownover

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       CHAPTER 2 Rome

      I couldn’t believe that crazy little sprite had the nerve to dump beer on my head. First of all, she barely came up to my shoulder, and second of all, she looked like a walking, talking piece of candy. Everything about her was so colorful it almost hurt to look at her.

      I should be furious at her, but she was right, I was an asshole. There was no reason to talk shit to Nash, no reason to get into it with Rule. I was just looking for a target to vent my frustrations at and those were the people closest to me. Maybe it was easier to unleash my aggravation at them, because I knew instinctively they would forgive me. I needed to find a place to have a drink and try and get my head together. A place that was dark and quiet and where no one expected me to be anything, or act a certain way. I was tired of not meeting expectations. I was not an idle man by nature. I was used to action, used to being in charge and taking the lead, and the only things I had managed to be on top of since coming back to Denver was pissing off everyone I encountered and drinking my considerable body weight in vodka. I was on a downhill slide that was bound to have an ugly-as-hell impact at the bottom and I knew it, but I felt powerless to stop it. Today was the proof of that.

      I pulled into the first bar that looked like it could handle the mood I was in. Independence Day, my left nut. I had had about enough of the revelry and good cheer to last me a lifetime. I just wanted to bury my head in the sand and go back to a point in time that felt comfortable and familiar. I hated feeling like a visitor in my own life, and no matter what I told myself when I woke up in the morning each day, I couldn’t shake feeling like everything I had come back to after my contract with the army was up was a life that belonged to someone else. My family didn’t feel right. The new dynamic in my relationship with Rule didn’t feel right. Trying to get used to Shaw being taken care of by my wayward and reckless little brother didn’t feel right. Crashing with Nash while I tried to get my shit straight didn’t feel right. Not having a job lined up or any clear direction of how to support myself doing something other than fighting a war quite possibly felt the most wrong out of it all.

      The bar was dark and not a place for those out for a fun Fourth-of-July cocktail. In the back, around several well-used pool tables, was a bunch of guys in biker gear sporting colors and looking like they meant business. Toward the front were several older men who looked like they never even got off the bar stool to go home and shower. Neil Young was blasting on the house speakers even though no one seemed like the type to sing along. This was not a place for the hip and trendy urbanites that flocked to Capitol Hill when the weather finally warmed up. I took a spot on an empty seat at the bar top and waited for the guy manning the bar to wander down to me.

      He was almost my size, which was rare, only he had a solid thirty years on me. He had a beard that looked like it could be the home to a whole family of squirrels, eyes the color of charcoal, and the grim countenance that could only be found in men who had seen the worst the world had to offer and come out the other side. I wasn’t surprised at all to see a marine tattoo inked on his bulky forearm when he propped himself up across from me and put down a battered coaster in front of me. I saw him size me up, but I was used to it. I was a big guy and other big guys liked to figure out if I was going to be the kind of trouble they could handle or not.

      “Boy, you already smell like a brewery. You sure you need to have another one?”

      I frowned until I remembered the little blonde pouring her beer over my head. She could have found a better way to make her point, I thought as I remembered the soggy state of my T-shirt. I didn’t know what to make of Cora Lewis. She was around a lot. We never really talked much. She was too loud and tended toward the dramatic, hence the Coors Light shower I had just received. Being around her made my head hurt and I didn’t like the way her mismatched eyes seemed to try and pick me apart.

      I took my sunglasses off the top of my head and hooked them in the collar of my T-shirt.

      “I picked a fight with the wrong pixie and she poured her drink on my head. I’m straight.”

      The guy gave me a once-over and must have deemed me okay because without my asking a tankard of beer was set in front of me along with a shot of something amber and strong. Typically I was a vodka drinker, but when the burly brute poured himself one and wandered back over to where I was seated, I didn’t dare complain.

      He lifted a bushy eyebrow at me and touched the rim of his shot glass to my own.

      “You army?”

      I nodded and shot back the liquor. It burned hot all the way down. If I wasn’t mistaken it was Wild Turkey.

      “I was. Just got out.”

      “How long did you serve for?”

      I rubbed a hand over my still-short hair. After wearing it cropped close to my head for so long, I really didn’t know what else to do with it.

      “Went in at eighteen and I turn twenty-eight at the end of this year. I was in for almost a decade.”

      “What did you do?”

      It wasn’t a question I normally answered because frankly the answer was long and anyone that hadn’t served just wouldn’t get it.

      “I was a field operations leader.”

      The bear of a man across from me let out a low whistle. “Spec ops?”

      I grunted a response and picked up the beer.

      “I bet they were sad to see you go.”

      The thing was, I think I was sadder to see them go. I wasn’t cleared for active duty anymore. My shoulder had taken a beating when we rolled over an IED on my last deployment and there were all kinds of shit rattling around in my head, constantly taking me out of the game. Sure, I could have taken a desk job, stepped down, and trained the generation coming up after me. But I wasn’t the best teacher and being tied to a desk was the same thing as retirement to me anyway. So I got out and now I had no fucking clue what I was going to do with the rest of my life.

      “What about you?” I motioned to the tattoo on his arm. “How long did you put in?”

      “Too СКАЧАТЬ