Off With His Head. Ngaio Marsh

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СКАЧАТЬ everybody about the Five Sons.’

      ‘She’ll be nosin’ up here to see it. Next thing she’ll be startin’ some beastly guild. She’s one of those stoopid women who turn odd and all that in their fifties. She’ll make a noosance of herself.’

      ‘That’s what the Old Guiser says, according to Chris.’

      ‘He’s perfectly right. William Andersen is a sensible fellow.’

      ‘Could you turn her away, Aunt Akky, if she comes?’

      Dame Alice merely gave an angry snap of her false teeth.

      ‘Is that young woman still at the Green Man?’ she demanded.

      ‘Do you mean William Andersen’s granddaughter?’

      ‘Who the deuce else should I mean?’

      ‘Yes she is. Everyone says she’s awfully nice and – well – you know –’

      ‘If you mean she’s a ladylike kind of creeter, why not say so?’

      ‘One doesn’t say that somehow, nowadays, Aunt Akky.’

      ‘More fool you.’

      ‘One says she’s a “lidy”.’

      ‘Nimby-pimby shilly-shallyin’ and beastly vulgar into the bargain. Is the gel more of a Campion than an Andersen?’

      ‘She’s got quite a look of her mother, but of course, Ned Campion brought her up as a Campion. Good schools and all that. She went to that awfully smart finishing school in Paris.’

      ‘And learnt a lot more than they bargained for, I dare say. Is she keepin’ up with the smithy?’

      ‘She’s quite cultivating them, it seems, and everybody says old William, although he pretends to disapprove, has really taken a great fancy to her. They say that she seems to like being with them. I suppose it’s the common side coming out.’

      ‘Lor’, what a howlin’ snob you are, Dulcie. All the more credit to the gel. But I won’t have Ralph gettin’ entangled.’

      ‘What makes you think –?’

      Dame Alice looked at her niece with contempt. ‘His father told me. Sam.’

      ‘The rector?’ Dulcie said automatically.

      ‘Yes, he’s the rector, Dulcie. He’s also your brother-in-law. Are you goin’ potty? It seems Ralph was noticed with the gel at Sandown and all that. He’s been payin’ her great ’tention. I won’t have it.’

      ‘Have you spoken to Ralph, Aunt Akky?’

      ‘’Course I have. ’Bout that and ’bout somethin’ else,’ said Dame Alice with satisfaction, ‘that he didn’t know I’d heard about. He’s a Mardian, is Master Ralph, if his mother did marry a parson. Young rake.’

      Dulcie looked at her aunt with a kind of dim, watery relish. ‘Goodness!’ she said. ‘Is Ralph a rake, Aunt Akky?’

      ‘Oh, go and do yer tattin’,’ said Dame Alice contemptuously, ‘you old maiden.’

      But Dulcie paid little attention to this insult. Her gaze had wandered to one of the many clocks in her aunt’s drawing-room.

      ‘Sword Wednesday tomorrow,’ she said romantically, ‘and in twenty-four hours they’ll be doing the Dance of the Five Sons. Fancy!’

      IV

      Their final practice over, the eight dancers contemplated each other with the steady complacency of men who have worked together in a strenuous job. Dr Otterly sat on an upturned box, laid his fiddle down and began to fill his pipe.

      ‘Fair enough,’ said Old William. ‘Might be better, mind.’ He turned on his youngest son. ‘You, Ernie,’ he said, ‘you’m Whiffler as us all knows to our cost. But that don’t say you’m toppermost item. Altogether too much biostrosity in your whiffling. No need to lay about like a madman. Show me your sword.’

      ‘No, I won’t, then,’ Ernie said. ‘Thik’s mine.’

      ‘Have you been sharpening up again? Come on. Have you?’

      ‘Thik’s a sword, bean’t ’er?’

      Ernie’s four brothers began to expostulate with him. They pointed out, angrily, that the function of the Whiffler was merely to go through a pantomime of making a clear space for the dance that was to follow. His activities were purest make-believe. Ralph and Dr Otterly joined in to point out that in other counties the whiffling was often done with a broom, and that Ernie, laying excitedly about him with a sword which, however innocuous at its point, had been made razor-sharp farther down, was a menace at once to his fellow-mummers and to his audience. All of them began shouting. Mrs Bünz at her lonely vigil outside the window, hugged herself in ecstasy. It was the ritual of purification that they shouted about. Immensely and thrillingly, their conversation was partly audible and entirely up her street. She died to proclaim her presence, to walk in, to join, blissfully, in the argument.

      Ernie made no answer to any of them. He stared loweringly at his father and devotedly at Simon Begg, who merely looked bored and slightly worried. At last, Ernie, under pressure, submitted his sword for examination and there were further ejaculations. Mrs Bünz could see it, a steel blade, pierced at the tip. A scarlet ribbon was knotted through the hole.

      ‘If one of us ’uns misses the strings and catches hold be the blade,’ old Andersen shouted, ‘as a chap well might in the heat of his exertions, he’d be cut to the bloody bone. Wouldn’t he, Doctor?’

      ‘And I’m the chap to do it,’ Chris roared out. ‘I come next, Ern. I might get me fingers sliced off.’

      ‘Not to mention my yed,’ his father added.

      ‘Here,’ Dr Otterly said quietly, ‘let’s have a squint at it.’

      He examined the sword and looked thoughtfully at its owner. ‘Why,’ he asked, ‘did you make it so sharp, boy?’

      Ernie wouldn’t answer. He held out his hand for the sword. Dr Otterly hesitated and then gave it to him. Ernie folded his arms over it and backed away cuddling it. He glowered at his father and muttered and snuffled.

      ‘You damned dunderhead,’ old William burst out, ‘hand over thik rapper. Come on. Us’ll take the edge off of it afore you gets loose on it again. Hand it over.’

      ‘I won’t, then.’

      ‘You will!’

      ‘Keep off of me.’

      Simon Begg said: ‘Steady, Ern. Easy does it.’

      ‘Tell him not to touch me, then.’

      ‘Naow, naow, naow!’ chanted his brothers.

      ‘I СКАЧАТЬ