Elvis and the Grateful Dead. Peggy Webb
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Название: Elvis and the Grateful Dead
Автор: Peggy Webb
Издательство: Ingram
Жанр: Ужасы и Мистика
Серия: A Southern Cousins Mystery
isbn: 9780758262967
isbn:
MURDER ON THE DANCE FLOOR
Lovie and Dick are gyrating so wildly that Mama and Uncle Charlie quit the dance floor. If I couldn’t see the panic on Lovie’s face, I’d think she was doing this on purpose.
“Uncle Charlie!” I yell, but he has already spun into action. When Dick Gerard topples, he lands right in Charlie Valentine’s arms.
While Tewanda Hardy and Beulah Jane fan Dick with their cardboard Elvis fans, I race inside to get some ice water and a cold cloth. Considering the heat, no wonder he’s so overcome. Not to mention the potentcy of Lovie’s charms and her Prohibition Punch.
By the time I get back, my bassett hound is on the scene and Dick is laid out on the concrete.
Uncle Charlie looks up from the body. “It’s no use, dear heart. He’s dead…”
Books by Peggy Webb
ELVIS AND THE DEARLY DEPARTED
ELVIS AND THE GRATEFUL DEAD
ELVIS AND THE MEMPHIS MAMBO MURDERS
Published by Kensington Publishing Corporation
Elvis and the Grateful Dead
Peggy Webb
KENSINGTON BOOKS
http://www.kensingtonbooks.com
For my dream team, agent Kelly Harms and editor
John Scognamiglio,
with love and deepest gratitude for giving me the
freedom to write with wings.
Contents
Elvis’ Opinion #1 on Impersonators, the Valentine Family, and Fried Pigskins
Chapter 1: Hair Gel, Flat Notes, and the Rockabilly Corpse
Chapter 2: Motels, Mexico, and the Fatal Fox-Trot
Elvis’ Opinion #2 on Icons, Hospitality, and Murder
Chapter 3: Clues, Mistaken Identity, and the Dead Dick
Chapter 4: Rhinestones, Half-Baked Plans, and Moaning Strangers
Elvis’ Opinion #3 on Cocker Spaniels, Sleeping Arrangements, and Rat Poison
Chapter 5: Sex, Valium, and the Big Bad Wolf
Chapter 6: Fancy Footwork, Fancy Lying, and Double Trouble
Elvis’ Opinion #4 on Appearances, Suspects, and Gossip
Chapter 7: Character Flaws, Dirty Linen, and Swiveling Hips
Chapter 8: Gamblin’, Lyin’, and Cheatin’
Elvis’ Opinion #5 on Style, Performance, and Top Billing
Chapter 9: Dangerous George, Pee-Wee Herman, and Hot Air
Chapter 10: Sunsets, Pompadours, and Pig Pens
Elvis’ Opinion #6 on Mismatched Anatomy, Psychic Powers, and Guilt
Chapter 11: Pork Revenge, Hog Death, and Handcuffs
Chapter 12: Costumes, Boyfriends, and Unexpected Developments
Elvis’ Opinion #7 on Vets, Cats, and Fate
Chapter 13: Guns, Perps, and Poison
Chapter 14: Sweet Talk, Lies, and Vanishing Elvises
Elvis’ Opinion #8 on Foreign Languages, Freedom, and Illegitimate Dogs
Chapter 15: Bribery, Cute Shoes, and Dark and Deadly Strangers
Chapter 16: Boogie, Bad Karma, and Hot Bodies
Elvis’ Opinion #9 on Marriage, Pickled Pigs’ Lips, and Mark Twain
Chapter 17: Bathroom Breaks, Hunks, and Suspicious Minds
Chapter 18: Winners, Losers, and Vanishing Bertha
Elvis’ Opinion #10 on Illegal Holes, Pissants, and Love Triangles
Chapter 19: Complications, Tangled Webs, and Geriatric Courtship
Chapter 20: Peach Tea, Poison, and Surprising Suspects
Elvis’ Opinion #11 on Motorcycles, Séances, and Courtship
Chapter 21: Red Roses, Wilted Daisies, and Jealous Lovers
Chapter 22: Guitars, Moonlight, and Smoking Shotguns
Elvis’ Opinion #12 on Hideaways, Harleys, and Hot Water
Elvis’ Opinion #1 on Impersonators, the Valentine Family, and Fried Pigskins
If you ask me, all these impersonators running around Tupelo in sequined jumpsuits could use remedial voice lessons. Nobody can hold a candle to the King. That would be me, though these days I could pass through a crowd unnoticed if it weren’t for my pink bow tie. I also wanted to wear my black pompadour to the Elvis Festival, but Callie (my human mom) said basset hounds look silly in toupees.
What does she know? Don’t get me wrong. She’s the best human mom a dog could have, but she can’t even keep her own life straight, much less mine. If she’d seek my sage advice, I’d tell her to stop trying to take care of the world (and that includes picking up stray dogs and cats as well as loaning money to everybody with a sob story who walks into her beauty shop). Mostly, though, I’d tell her to drop divorce proceedings.
If any two people belong together, it’s Callie and Jack (my human daddy). She says they split over his Harley Screamin’ Eagle, but I know better. They split because she wants a family and he’s worried about having children and then getting shot and leaving them fatherless.
Of course, he’s never told Callie the truth because he’s never even told her about his real profession—and if I told you, I’d have to kill you. Suffice it to say, Jack Jones makes Rambo look timid.
Callie and Jack are at an impasse and “All Shook Up.” At the rate things are going, it looks like I’ll be punted between them for the next three years. Like a pigskin.
Speaking of which, I think I’ll mosey on over to the refreshment booth and see what’s cooking. Fried pigskins, for one thing. Lovie’s in charge. She shares my opinion that the body ought to be primed with sugar and fat. (Spirits, too, which she uses generously in her catering business recipes, though Callie would die if she knew her cousin sometimes slips me a little of her Jack Daniel’s apple pie.)
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