To Eternity. Daisy Banks

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СКАЧАТЬ a decision, Magnus. I’d like us to decide soon. I can’t bear this. Everything would be solved if…”

      “I know. After I bathe, you can tell me what happened while we eat.”

      Sian placed a kiss on the end of her finger and pressed it to his lips before she left. His heart ached for her hopes, for her confidence that she could make all well. He dropped the grubby robe, climbed into the tub, and closed his eyes. This full moon had pushed the usual boundaries. The additional power of Samhain seemed to have supercharged his appetite, but there was more than he’d anticipated. Though often he returned from transformation confused, his body still attuned to the senses of the wolf, this evening every muscle clenched tight, filled with lactic acid, as though he’d been rigid since Friday night when the full moon shifted his consciousness. Somehow, in his transformed state as the wolf, he’d spent hours fighting to keep himself still. The reason for such strange behavior in the beast eluded him.

      He tilted his head back into the water, so the warmth might ease his corded neck muscles. The sensation of heat welcome, he sank lower in the tub until the water covered his hair. He hoped this would soothe his skin and his pain, but until he spoke with her about what had happened, nothing would pacify his fears. Annoyance that he couldn’t recall the acts of the beast swept through him. There had been times like this before. Even when he’d killed, a savage act any creature should remember, he could recollect nothing beyond the satisfaction of blood. But, if he’d harmed Sian, the wolf would have howled its sorrow until the walls echoed his repentance.

      If only there were a way to force himself to remember. Truly, he was cursed.

      Tired, his muscles clinging onto the edge of tension, he flipped on the shower attachment. He stood as the water drained from the tub. Angling the showerhead, he turned on the water and sucked in a breath at the cool blast. Skin tingling from his rinse, he clambered out of the bath. At least he now stood clean. Once he’d dried off, he put on a fresh robe, cleaned his teeth, and combed through his hair, following a morning routine despite the evening. Finally, he shoved his feet into rattan house shoes. Full of fear at what Sian may say, he made his way down the green, wrought iron, spiral stairs to the kitchen.

      Sian sat at the broad table sipping from a big blue mug. Coffee from the aroma, bacon and eggs, too, were ready. Under covered dishes, the food was hot from the stove. The residue of wolf senses fought with his man-brain to analyze all the information. Tonight, a ripe, powerful scent haunted his kitchen unlike any he’d known in an age. The odor of blood, an iron rich tang, packed with a sultry promise, smoldered around him.

      Female blood.

      “I must have wounded you deeper than you think,” he said, reaching for her arm but not touching in case he might cause further pain. “You must be bleeding still.”

      “No.” She shook her head and glanced at the bandage. “It’s not the arm. It’s another kind of bleeding. I think it made things worse this month. I should have left the room once you were caged.”

      “Oh,” he said, registering her meaning at once. “That’s something I’d not thought on.” He accepted the mug of coffee she put in his hand. Her hormones prodded the wolf senses with a fragrant lure. Instead of lying dormant as they should have after his transformation, they set an echo of desire through his bloodstream. “Yes, it may well have provoked the creature.”

      “Hmm,” she murmured. “You could say that.”

      He slid his arm around her, bent his head to her shoulder, and pressed a kiss to the warmth of her neck. “I’m sorry. So sorry.”

      She stroked over his damp hair, brushing it back from his forehead. “It’s all right. I’ll know next time—it’s my fault—it took me a day and a half to understand what was going on. I was so worried about you, I’m afraid I got closer than I should have. I looked for you in the dreams as well, but no, not this time. I think you were buried deep within the wolf senses this month, much more than the last time. Me…” She glanced down. “Me being like this made things worse. Please, sit. You must be hungry as well as exhausted. You didn’t eat all the steak I gave you.”

      “I didn’t?” He sat.

      “No, so you must be hungry.” She lifted the lids on the covered dishes.

      Glad to wean back another sense from the wolf for the here and now, he luxuriated in the smell of food.

      Sian dished up several slices of bacon and added a generous helping of scrambled eggs, two cooked tomatoes, plus several mushrooms.

      He accepted the plate. His stomach growled as though the wolf spoke from within, yet still he had to force himself to pick up the fork. “Forgive me?” he whispered.

      “Of course.” Her gaze held his, a shimmer of moisture in her eyes. She swallowed hard, her smooth throat moving fast. “It wasn’t your fault. We both knew this month would be hard, with it being October. I didn’t understand your need, or the way I affected you. I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again, but I think this must be another reason why you should consider making me your true mate.”

      “Not yet!” A fresh wave of guilt barreled through him at her teary glance in response to his tone. His hopes to control the vile process of transformation lay in a ruin. Last month, the rage Franklyn had provoked in him by attacking Sian, empowered him to take control of the wolf and change at will. He’d hoped from that time on, he could control the shift even at the full moon, but no, the moon still dominated his world, his life, leaving him fearful for Sian. She could eventually control him, but she needed time to learn how to use her innate skills. “You are my true mate, my woman. But, please, don’t force more, not yet.”

      “Eat.” She wiped beneath her eye with her knuckle. “There’s lots of time, you’ve said so.”

      He swallowed a mouthful, then another, unable to meet her gaze right now, lost in the strangeness of the restoration of human needs. Most of all, he floundered in his anguish, for he’d explained so little to her. She remained at the mercy of the moon tides in his blood. He’d thought ensuring her safety from Franklyn’s cruel obsession his foremost duty, but he needed to do much more to help her find her path in the convoluted ways of the wolf. “You’re not eating?”

      “No.” She shook her head. “I’m too tired.”

      He shoved the plate away. “Then come here, we’ll go up to bed. We’ll sleep. Tonight we can dream together. In the dreams we’re free.”

      “I’d like that, Magnus. Right now, I’d like to be free, just us, with nothing else to think of at all.”

      He moved around the table as she pushed back her chair and stood. She gave a sigh as he took her into his embrace. Nothing could have spoken so loud as her soft breath to tell of the fears she’d tried to hide. “My brave, Sian,” he whispered, brushing his lips against her forehead. “I promise you next month will be easier.”

      “I know”—she glanced down to her arm—“this isn’t too bad, Magnus. Perhaps, if we’d met in June things would have been different.”

      “Yes,” he said, as they made their way up the spiral staircase. Every step he took, he hated himself for a coward. If he’d met Sian in June, things would have been easier for a brief time, perhaps, but she would still have had to meet the beast in its hunting state at some full moon. This month, the wolf within him had longed to hunt.

      He stretched as she kicked off her sports shoes beside the curtained bed. СКАЧАТЬ