God Don't Play. Mary Monroe

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СКАЧАТЬ skin was due to good genes, Ivory soap, and warm water. Rhoda spent a fortune on wrinkle creams and facials, and had vowed to get a face-lift as soon as she felt she needed one.

      I had slipped into a fresh muumuu and a pair of comfortable shoes, but I was still on edge. I didn’t know what Rhoda had planned, but I was hoping that it involved something that required me to leave my house. It had begun to feel like a chamber of horrors.

      A flimsy, red-checked bandanna covered my head. The line in the nasty note about me having a receding hairline had sent me running to the bathroom mirror. I didn’t know what constituted a receding hairline to most people, but I didn’t agree with the person who had sent me the note. However, the remark had made me self-conscious enough to cover my whole head. It didn’t bother me that I looked like a straight-up mammy next to Jade and Rhoda. That was nothing new, and I was used to it.

      “Hi, Auntie,” Jade said, covering my cheek with hungry little kisses.

      Her warm, wet lips made my face tingle. It puzzled me when, out of the corner of my eyes, I saw Jade wipe her lips with the back of her hand after kissing me. I smiled because she smiled.

      “Uh, you taste kind of salty and sweaty,” she explained, realizing I’d seen her wiping her lips. “And, by the way, you could use a serious facial, Auntie.”

      “I could use a lot of things, baby,” I said sadly, drifting back to my sofa where I plopped down so hard my thighs vibrated.

      Jade and Rhoda looked at each other and shrugged. Jade swiped her lips again, holding on to her yellow backpack with both hands. She protected it like it held mankind’s greatest secrets, hiding it in a spot in her bedroom where even Rhoda couldn’t find it. Other than the Frederick’s of Hollywood catalogues and the other risqué items that she decided she had to have, I didn’t know what else Jade concealed in her backpack. Frankly, I didn’t want to know. However, one time when she accidentally dropped it in front of me, the lid flew open and a package of condoms fell to the floor. Before Rhoda could see what had dropped out, I’d kicked the package of condoms up under the bottom of my sofa, nodding as Jade gave me a conspiratorial wink. I knew that I was part of the reason Jade was the way she was. But compared to some kids, Jade was still a good girl. And I was so proud of her.

      I grabbed Jade’s hand and pulled her onto my lap, the same way I had done since she was a very young child. Rhoda stood over me with her arms folded, with the same scowl still on her face.

      “Where’s the note?” she asked, looking around my living room.

      I nodded to one of the end tables by the sofa.

      “Mama said that it’s probably from somebody who is jealous of you,” Jade announced, patting my shoulder and rocking back and forth on my lap. She felt as light as a feather, but she was as solid as a brick. “I said, ‘Horsefeathers!’ to Mama,” Jade hollered. Even though she sounded and looked profoundly bored, I knew in my heart that Jade was just as concerned about my well-being as Rhoda was.

      While Rhoda was looking in another direction, I slid the Frederick’s catalogue under the pillow next to me. With a frightened look, Jade took a deep breath, held her finger up to her lips, shook her head, and quickly snatched the catalogue from under the pillow. Within seconds Jade had stuffed it into her backpack.

      Clearing her throat, she continued talking. “Yeah, somebody is straight-up jealous of you, Auntie.”

      Jade spoke with such authority she almost had me believing every word that came out of her mouth. But after I gave her comments some thought, I had a hard time believing that anybody was jealous of me. I could feel an incredulous look slide across my face. “Jealous? Jealous of me? What in the world do I have for anybody to be jealous of?” I asked, waving my hand.

      I noticed a slight frown on Jade’s face when she noticed my nails.

      “Uh…uh…that’s the same thing I asked Mama,” Jade stammered, nodding so hard her eyes blinked. “I mean, what do you have that would make anybody jealous?” Jade made a sweeping gesture with one hand, holding on for dear life to the strap of her backpack with the other.

      I was horrified when I saw the lip of a beer bottle peeking from an unzipped pocket on the side of the backpack. Jade’s eyes followed mine. She gave me a contrite look before she slung her backpack around to the side, her back to me and Rhoda as she zipped it up.

      “Jade’s got a point,” I said in an offhanded way, with an acute sadness tugging at my heart. It was a struggle for me to remain composed, but I managed to curl my lips into a weak smile. I wasn’t trying to be sarcastic and my feelings didn’t feel hurt. Jade was not malicious or insensitive. At least, not on purpose. She was sophisticated and mature when it benefited her, but she was still young enough to use her youth as an excuse when she crossed the wrong line.

      Rhoda read the note in silence. There was an amused look on her face when she looked up. “I know you aren’t takin’ this seriously.” She laughed in a way that sounded like it was coming from some place other than my living room. Like a hollow cave or some place equally bleak.

      “Why shouldn’t I?” I asked, gently pushing Jade slightly to the side.

      “Girl, this is about as serious as a chain letter I received last month that said I was goin’ to have nine years of bad luck if I broke the chain,” Rhoda said, hands on her hips. “I threw it in the trash and that’s just where this belongs.”

      Rhoda lifted an eyebrow and winked at me as she ripped the note and the envelope into tiny pieces. Then she waltzed across the floor to a wastepaper basket next to my entertainment center, and let the pieces fall in with the rest of the trash. Strutting back across the floor rubbing the palms of her hands along the sides of her jeans, she gave me a triumphant look. “Now. That’s the end of that,” she said, folding her arms. “What did you do with that snake?”

      I turned to Jade and dipped my head, as if offering her a cue to speak again. She ran with it.

      “Oh, I took care of that myself,” Jade told Rhoda, sounding excited. “I put it back in the same box that it came in, and then I had the maintenance man take it to the Dumpster.” Jade eased up from my lap. “Auntie, why don’t you come to Cleveland with us? After we finish shopping, we can go have a real nice lunch at that deli on Superior that you like so much. You can eat all the fried chicken, liver, greens, ribs, oxtails, corn bread, black-eyed peas, and all the rest of that stuff you like to eat so much—as much as you want. My treat.”

      Eating was the last thing on my mind. As a matter of fact, just hearing Jade name all the items on that soul food smorgasbord made me nauseated. I had to hold my breath for a moment to keep from throwing up.

      “I don’t think so,” I said firmly, shaking my head and my hand. “I have a lot to do around the house before Pee Wee and Charlotte come home tomorrow,” I stated, wobbling up from the sofa.

      “Well, can we bring you something back?” Rhoda asked.

      “I’m fine now. You all go on,” I said, nodding toward the door. “Thanks for coming over here and I am sorry it had to be for something so foolish.”

      “Are you sure you’re all right now? You want to spend the night with us? We should be back home before dinner,” Rhoda said, her arm around Jade’s shoulder.

      “I’m fine. Just call me when you get back home,” I said, easing them out the door.

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