Diagnosis: Heart Attack. Karla Weller

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СКАЧАТЬ “Stand up” from Boris Grundl on the shelf next to Gerd’s hospital bed. Only a few months ago, we had attended an inspiring lecture at which Boris Grundl impressively demonstrated how he had found a new and even better life when he became paraplegic, which he had initially felt was the end of the world. If Gerd woke up, he should be immediately reminded of that and realize that people can start over, especially after such a bitter twist of fate.

      One day later, I wanted to visit Gerd late in the evening, but was not allowed to see him. He was very restless and was being treated by two nurses. I was asked to be patient and wait outside in the station’s waiting room. Unfortunately, this happened again and again. When Gerd grew restless, he was given another dose of a sedative that put him back into the artificial coma. So we could never tell how much of his unconsciousness was caused by the artificial coma. How strong were his will and power to return to this life? Where did one stop and the other begin? I was told this was best for him because such massive restlessness might additionally harm his psyche and he might injure himself thrashing about in his bed. To avoid injuries, he had been “strapped” to the bed when I came to visit quite often. Seeing him like that just broke my heart.

      While I was waiting to be let into Gerd’s room that evening, the head of the clinic was still on his late ward rounds. When he saw me, he sat down with me in silence for a little while and finally told me he had recently lost his best friend to a heart attack. No one had been around to help him, so he had died alone, suddenly and unexpectedly. I could sense how it had emotionally affected the doctor himself when he asked how old Justin was that he had acted so prudently, thus saving his father’s life. It was very lucky for Gerd that he had and, yet, it was a huge strain on Justin to have seen his father fighting for his life. Regardless of how things continued for Gerd, I couldn’t allow Justin to blame himself for not having done enough. In fact, his behavior had far exceeded what was humanly possible!

      Despite all this, Gerd’s condition didn’t allow for a prognosis, the doctor said, so we had to be prepared for anything at any time.

      Shortly thereafter, the doctor accompanied me to Gerd’s room. “The walk from the entryway to the hospital room is always hard because I never know in what condition I would find my husband in,” I remarked. But today, I could hear Gerd screaming in despair from afar. Although he wouldn’t say any recognizable words, it was clear he was terrified. He thrashed around in bed and made noises that sounded more like an animal than a human. I went straight to him and laid one hand on his forehead and the other on the back of his neck and whispered soothing words in his ear. Gerd quickly grew calm, his heart rate stabilized at a normal level and his body relaxed. The display on the vitals monitor returned to a normal curve. The Jin Shin Jiutsu “emergency current” was working and performed its miracle cure. When I turned around after a few minutes, I realized the head of the clinic was gone. He had watched from the door as Gerd reacted positively to my presence and interpreted this as a sure sign that he recognized me. The doctor then ordered that an early rehabilitation spot for Gerd be rigorously sought. The clinics in the vicinity that came into question were all full, but they eventually found one in the Bavarian Alps.

      However, in order to be moved there, Gerd had to be able to be tube-fed which first required an opening which, of course, would place additional, extreme stress on his body.

      A few days later, a gastric feeding tube was inserted and Gerd was then immediately transported by ambulance to the neurological intensive care unit in the Bavarian Alps.

November 2011–January 2012 Neurological Clinic, Bavarian Alps

      My mother and I drove there directly from home, in our own car, and waited in the hospital ward for Gerd’s arrival, which was delayed for hours. Naturally, I immediately regretted not accompanying him in the ambulance, but how would I have gotten back home later? Unfortunately, my mom never had a driver’s license herself. Due to a rare eye disease in her younger years, she never passed the requested visual test.

      I didn’t muster the courage to ask the two paramedics why they had needed so long to get there. Gerd had been transported wearing only a hospital gown and his body was ice cold when he was finally lying in his new bed after a transportation time of more than three hours. Although he still wasn’t completely conscious, he screamed in pain and fear. The situation was gruesome and inhumane for all of us.

      At the rehabilitation clinic, he was given his own room with a balcony, but the room wasn’t equipped for intensive care at all. I was very worried about how Gerd could even be monitored and fully cared for here.

      But the worst was still before us. After a while, two neurologists appeared and spoke to Gerd with loud voices, “Sorry, Sir, but since you won’t talk to us, we have to annoy you a bit to see if you’re even feeling anything!” and then they took turns pinching Gerd’s shins!

      At this point I just wanted to take my husband and flee the hospital right away, but again I didn’t have the courage!

      At least, it got better later. The nurses were very friendly and caring, talked to him quietly and made a good impression on me.

      Once his room was equipped with a monitor for observing Gerd’s vitals from the nurses’ station, I calmed down. For the first time, Gerd was fed via the new gastric feeding tube. When my mother and I left a few hours later, he was lying peacefully in his new bed.

      Later that day, as I lay in bed myself, my thoughts were of course with Gerd. What awaited him at the new clinic? What progress could be expected? How would he fare? Was he being well taken care of? Who was taking care of him when I wasn’t there?

      I still had to go to work every day and that meant driving fifteen miles to work and then, in the evening, all the way back to the Bavarian Alps. It was winter time so I had to spend several hours on the road each time and it wouldn’t be possible for me to visit Gerd every day during the week anymore. I poured all of my worries into my evening prayers which, of course, included the best wishes for Gerd’s recovery. This personal conversation with God allowed me to finally find peace and fall sound asleep.

      When I awoke the next morning, I naturally wanted to know how Gerd had coped his first night in the new environment, but at the same time, I was afraid to call the clinic and hear the news. I mustered all of my courage and dialed the ward’s number. The response was far too short and matter-of-fact. Gerd had had a very restless night; otherwise, there was nothing to report.

      That weekend, I went to the clinic early in the morning and was just about to go into his room, when a nurse pulled me aside. “Don’t be frightened Mrs. Kaehler, there’s news! This morning, when I went into his room to open the curtains, I said, ‘Good morning, Mr. Kaehler!’ like I always do, and was completely dumbfounded when I heard him respond, ‘Good morning!’ Gerd had sat up in bed on his own and responded to her greeting! She was so shocked; she had to sit down on a chair herself. “It was a situation that felt like someone had awakened from the dead!” It was the very first time since his heart attack, nearly four weeks prior, that Gerd had said anything comprehensible; and of all things after the gastric feeding tube procedure and the terrible ambulance transport the day before! That he even found the strength to sit up all by himself, simply was beyond imagination.

      Completely overjoyed I hurried into the hospital room, but when I actually saw Gerd sitting up in bed, it hit me like a lightning bolt and I was only able to run out of the room before I fell to my knees in the hall, sobbing. Two nurses were immediately at my side supporting me. They didn’t try to persuade me to go back into the room, but instead understood that this new situation had literally knocked me over!

      When I was finally able to approach Gerd, I realized this wasn’t the person I had expected. Outwardly, he looked like Gerd; he even looked fairly good. His facial expression was relaxed, betraying the stress he had endured over the last four weeks. But Gerd reacted СКАЧАТЬ