My Secret Life, Volumes I. to III. - The Original Classic Edition. Anonymous Anonymous

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СКАЧАТЬ in their fields, and in those days, living in the country as he did, I dare say it was true, but I

       don't recollect ever having seen the pricks of full grown men, or a

       naked man before in my life.

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       It must have been in the summer of that same year, that I went after this to spend some days at my aunt's at H...ds...e..., Fred's mother.

       We slept in the some room, and sometimes got up quite at daybreak to go fishing. One morning Fred had left something, in one of his sisters' rooms and went to fetch it, though forbidden to go into the girls' bedrooms. The room in question was opposite to ours. He was only partly dressed, and came back in a second, his face grinning. "Oh! come Wat, come softly, Lucy and Mary are quite naked, you can see their cunts,

       Lucy has some black hair on hers." I was only half dressed, and much excited by the idea of seeing my cousins' nudity. We both took off our slippers, and crept along through the door half open, then went on our knees! But why we did so, to this day I don't understand, and so crept

       to the foot of the bed, then raising ourselves, we both looked over the footboard.

       Lucy, fifteen years old, was laying half on her side, naked from her knees to her waist, the bedclothes kicked off (I suppose through heat), were dragging across her feet and partly laying on the floor; we saw her split, till lost in the closed thighs, she had a little dark short hair

       over the top of her cunt, and that is all I can recollect about it.

       Mary-Ann by the side of her, a year younger only, laid on her back, nacked up to her navel, just above which was her nightgown in a heap and ruck; she had scarcely a sign of hair on her cunt, but a vermillion line, lay right through her crack. Projecting more towards the top,

       where her cunt began, she had what I now know was a strongly developed

       clitoris; she was a lovely girl and had long chestnut hair.

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       Whilst we looked she moved one leg up in a restless manner, and we bobbed down, thinking she was awaking; when we looked again, her limbs were more open, and we saw the cunt till it was pinched up, by the

       closing of her buttocks. In fear of being caught, we soon crept out, closed the door ajar, and regained our bedroom, so delighted that we danced with joy, as we talked about the look of the two cunts; of which, after all, we had only had a most partial, rapid glimpse.

       Lucy was a very plain girl, and was so as a woman. She had, I recollect, a very red bloated looking face as she lay (it was so hot); she it was, who in afterlife my mother cautioned about leaving her infant son to a nursemaid.

       Mary-Ann was lovely. I used afterwards to look and talk with her, thinking to myself: "Ah! you have but little idea, that I have seen your cunt." She was unfortunate; married a cavalry officer, went to India

       with him, was left at a station unavoidably by her husband, who was sent on a campaign, for a whole year; could not bear being deprived of cock, and was caught in the act of fucking with a drummer boy, a mere lad.

       She was separated from him, came back to England, and drank herself to death. She was a salacious young woman, I think from what I recollect

       of her, and am told, was afterwards fucked by a lot of men; but it was a sore point with the family, and all about her was kept quiet.

       One of Lucy's sons, in after years, I saw fucking a maid in a

       summer-house: both standing up against a big table; I was on the roof. Many years before that, I fucked a nursemaid, she laying on that table, in the very same summer-house, as I shall presently tell.

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       Fred and I used to discuss the look of his sisters' and mother's cunts, as if they had belonged to strangers. The redness of the line

       in Mary-Ann's quim astonished us. I do not recollect having even then, formed any definite notion of what a girl's cunt was, though we had seen the splits, but had still, and till much further on, the notion that the

       hole was round, and close to where the clitoris is, having no idea then of what a clitoris was, though we had got an Aristotle and used to read it greedily; the glimpse of the two cunts were but momentary, and our excitement confused our recollections.

       Fred and I then formed a plot to look at another girl's cunt; who the girl was, I don't know, it may have been another of Fred's sisters, or

       a cousin by another of my aunts, but I think not; at all events she was stopping in aunt's house, and from her height, which was less than that of Fred and myself, I should think a girl of about eleven or twelve years of age. I scrupulously avoid stating anything positively, unless

       quite certain. Some years afterwards when we were very young men, we did the same thing with a female cousin (but not his sister), as I shall tell.

       There was haymaking. We romped with the girl, buried each other in hay, pulled each other out, and so on. I was buried in the hay and dragged

       out by my legs by Fred and the girl. Then Fred was: then we buried the girl, and as Fred pulled her out he threw up her clothes, I lay over her head, which was covered with hay. Fred saw, winked and nodded. It came to my turn again to be buried, and then hers; I laid hold of her legs

       and pulling them from under the hay, saw her thighs, I pushed her knees up, and had a glimpse of the slit, which was quite hairless. My aunt

       and others were in the very field, but had no idea of the game we were

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       playing, the girl romping with us, had no idea, that we were looking at her cunt, and an instantaneous peep only it was.

       What effect sensuously, these glimpses of cunt, had on me, I don't know; but have no recollection of sexual desire, nor of mine nor Fred's cock being stiff. I expect that what with games, and our studies, that after

       all the time we devoted to thinking about women, was not long, and curiosity our sole motive in doing what we did. I clearly recollect our talking at that time about fucking, and wondering if it were true or a lie. We could repeat what we had read, and heard, but it still seemed improbable to me that a cock should go up a cunt, and the result be a child.

       Then a passionate liking for females came over me; I fell in sort of

       love with a lady who must have been forty, and had a sad feeling about her, that is all I recollect. Then I began to follow servants about,

       on the hope of seeing their legs, or seeing them piddle, or for some undefined object: but that I was always looking after them, I know very well.

       Then (I know now) my father got into difficulties, we moved into a smaller house, the governess went away, I was sent to another school, one of my brothers and sisters died; my father went abroad to look after some plantations, and after a year's absence came back and died,

       leaving my mother, in what compared with our former condition, were poor circumstances, but this in due course will be more fully told.

       I think I went to school, though not long before what I am going to tell of happened, but am not certain, if so, I must have seen boys frigging;

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