50+ Space Action Adventure Classics. Жюль Верн

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СКАЧАТЬ unknown things that were rushing upon us out of the inhuman void, before I rebelled? But at last I could stand it no longer, and I reproached Parload very bitterly for wasting his time in “astronomical dilettantism.”

      “Here,” said I. “We’re on the verge of the biggest lockout in the history of this countryside; here’s distress and hunger coming, here’s all the capitalistic competitive system like a wound inflamed, and you spend your time gaping at that damned silly streak of nothing in the sky!”

      Parload stared at me. “Yes, I do,” he said slowly, as though it was a new idea. “Don’t I? … I wonder why.”

      “I want to start meetings of an evening on Howden’s Waste.”

      “You think they’d listen?”

      “They’d listen fast enough now.”

      “They didn’t before,” said Parload, looking at his pet instrument.

      “There was a demonstration of unemployed at Swathinglea on Sunday.

       They got to stone throwing.”

      Parload said nothing for a little while and I said several things.

       He seemed to be considering something.

      “But, after all,” he said at last, with an awkward movement towards his spectroscope, “that does signify something.”

      “The comet?”

      “Yes.”

      “What can it signify? You don’t want me to believe in astrology. What does it matter what flames in the heavens — when men are starving on earth?”

      “It’s — it’s science.”

      “Science! What we want now is socialism — not science.”

      He still seemed reluctant to give up his comet.

      “Socialism’s all right,” he said, “but if that thing up there WAS to hit the earth it might matter.”

      “Nothing matters but human beings.”

      “Suppose it killed them all.”

      “Oh,” said I, “that’s Rot,”

      “I wonder,” said Parload, dreadfully divided in his allegiance.

      He looked at the comet. He seemed on the verge of repeating his growing information about the nearness of the paths of the earth and comet, and all that might ensue from that. So I cut in with something I had got out of a now forgotten writer called Ruskin, a volcano of beautiful language and nonsensical suggestions, who prevailed very greatly with eloquent excitable young men in those days. Something it was about the insignificance of science and the supreme importance of Life. Parload stood listening, half turned towards the sky with the tips of his fingers on his spectroscope. He seemed to come to a sudden decision.

      “No. I don’t agree with you, Leadford,” he said. “You don’t understand about science.”

      Parload rarely argued with that bluntness of opposition. I was so used to entire possession of our talk that his brief contradiction struck me like a blow. “Don’t agree with me!” I repeated.

      “No,” said Parload

      “But how?”

      “I believe science is of more importance than socialism,” he said.

       “Socialism’s a theory. Science — science is something more.”

      And that was really all he seemed to be able to say.

      We embarked upon one of those queer arguments illiterate young men used always to find so heating. Science or Socialism? It was, of course, like arguing which is right, left handedness or a taste for onions, it was altogether impossible opposition. But the range of my rhetoric enabled me at last to exasperate Parload, and his mere repudiation of my conclusions sufficed to exasperate me, and we ended in the key of a positive quarrel. “Oh, very well!” said I. “So long as I know where we are!”

      I slammed his door as though I dynamited his house, and went raging down the street, but I felt that he was already back at the window worshiping his blessed line in the green, before I got round the corner.

      I had to walk for an hour or so, before I was cool enough to go home.

      And it was Parload who had first introduced me to socialism!

      Recreant!

      The most extraordinary things used to run through my head in those days. I will confess that my mind ran persistently that evening upon revolutions after the best French pattern, and I sat on a Committee of Safety and tried backsliders. Parload was there, among the prisoners, backsliderissimus, aware too late of the error of his ways. His hands were tied behind his back ready for the shambles; through the open door one heard the voice of justice, the rude justice of the people. I was sorry, but I had to do my duty.

      “If we punish those who would betray us to Kings,” said I, with a sorrowful deliberation, “how much the more must we punish those who would give over the State to the pursuit of useless knowledge”; and so with a gloomy satisfaction sent him off to the guillotine.

      “Ah, Parload! Parload! If only you’d listened to me earlier,

       Parload… .”

      None the less that quarrel made me extremely unhappy. Parload was my only gossip, and it cost me much to keep away from him and think evil of him with no one to listen to me, evening after evening.

      That was a very miserable time for me, even before my last visit to Checkshill. My long unemployed hours hung heavily on my hands. I kept away from home all day, partly to support a fiction that I was sedulously seeking another situation, and partly to escape the persistent question in my mother’s eyes. “Why did you quarrel with Mr. Rawdon? Why DID you? Why do you keep on going about with a sullen face and risk offending IT more?” I spent most of the morning in the newspaper-room of the public library, writing impossible applications for impossible posts — I remember that among other things of the sort I offered my services to a firm of private detectives, a sinister breed of traders upon base jealousies now happily vanished from the world, and wrote apropos of an advertisement for “stevedores” that I did not know what the duties of a stevedore might be, but that I was apt and willing to learn — and in the afternoons and evenings I wandered through the strange lights and shadows of my native valley and hated all created things. Until my wanderings were checked by the discovery that I was wearing out my boots.

      The stagnant inconclusive malaria of that time!

      I perceive that I was an evil-tempered, ill-disposed youth with a great capacity for hatred, BUT —

      There was an excuse for hate.

      It was wrong of me to hate individuals, to be rude, harsh, and vindictive to this person or that, but indeed it would have been equally wrong to have taken the manifest offer life made me, without resentment. I see now clearly and calmly, what I then felt obscurely and with an unbalanced intensity, that my conditions were intolerable. СКАЧАТЬ