The Complete Plays of J. M. Barrie - 30 Titles in One Edition. Джеймс Барри

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СКАЧАТЬ among the S’s?

      COSENS. Are you going to look it up in the books?

      YELLOWLEES. I might as well.

      COSENS. Good.

      (YELLOWLEES bows and exits.)

      (Amused.) Great! I like this fellow. I’ll tell you why presently. You are sure my visit does not put you about?

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Quite the contrary. The only thing is, that you must sleep at the Inn.

      COSENS. That will suit me famously.

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Our cottage is so small that even Miss White had to get a bedroom in the village.

      COSENS. Speaking of Miss White, I was looking for her just now when I met you.

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Ah!

      COSENS. How is she doing here?

      (MISS GOODWILLIE makes depreciating gesture.) I thought so.

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Why didn’t you write and tell me of what was going on in London?

      COSENS. To begin with, it took me a week to find out.

      MISS GOODWILLIE. It took me ten minutes.

      COSENS. And, besides, to tell you the truth — Miss White was too clever for me.

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Clever, bah! The stupidest woman is more than a match for the cleverest man.

      COSENS. And she and I are neither one nor the other. Well, what is the situation now?

      (LUCY’S voice is heard calling ‘Peepbo.’)

      Eh!

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Here they come. So you can judge for yourself.

      (cosens and miss goodwillie kneel behind stack.

      lucy again calls ‘Peepbo ‘ and hides by stack. She then calls ‘Peepbo.’ Enter professor gaily, with fishingrod and creel. He looks over rick and points at her. They don’t see miss goodwillie and cosens.)

      PROFESSOR. Ah ha, found! Now, Miss Lucy, I’ll tell you what we’ll do. You shall stay there and I’ll pretend I can’t find you.

      LUCY (laughing). Don’t you think it’s rather childish.

      PROFESSOR. Not at all! It’s splendid fun.

      COSENS (rising). Peepbo! Hello, Tom! Do, Miss White!

      PROFESSOR. Hello, Dick!

      (LUCY jumps up.)

      Why, when did you come?

      COSENS. Just arrived —

      PROFESSOR. Had you a good —

      COSENS. Capital! Carriage to myself all the way. And how are you, Tom?

      PROFESSOR. Much better — am I not, Miss Lucy?

      LUCY. Anyone can see you are, isn’t it so, Miss Goodwillie?

      (MISS GOODWILLIE shows displeasure.)

      PROFESSOR. I say, Dick, do you remember what you thought was the matter with me?

      COSENS. I do!

      LUCY. And fancy, it turned out to be lumbago, Doctor. Is quinine good for lumbago?

      (COSENS winces.)

      PROFESSOR. Of course it was lumbago. Do I look as if it was the other thing, Dick? Ha, ha, Agnes, come here. Listen, Miss Lucy. I have such a joke for you, it is something I have not breathed to a soul, because it gave me such a fright at the time. You won’t mind my telling them, Dick?

      COSENS. Why should I?

      PROFESSOR. Well, you know, it does turn the laugh against you.

      COSENS. H’m!

      PROFESSOR. It’s this, Agnes. Listen, Miss Lucy. Dr. Cosens thought I had lost my power to work because I was in love, ha, ha, ha!

      (Laughs, COSENS and LUCY laugh, MISS GOODWILLIE does not.)

      LUCY. You’re not laughing, Miss Goodwillie.

      (MISS GOODWILLIE goes up stage angrily, COSENS laughs heartily.)

      PROFESSOR. Unless it was one of your jokes, Dick, you are a trump to take it so well.

      COSENS. H’m! It is another joke I am laughing at, Tom. But as you are mending so rapidly, I suppose you are at work on your book again?

      (LUCY rises.)

      PROFESSOR. Eh — ah — no! I haven’t done anything to my book. The fact is, I have been so busy with other things —

      COSENS. Such as ‘Peepbo.’ PROFESSOR. Well, at all events, if I was in love I wouldn’t be playing ‘peepbo’ with Miss White, would I?

      COSENS. What would you be doing?

      LUCY. He would be with his inamorata, of course — wouldn’t you, Professor?

      PROFESSOR (rises). Naturally. Surely you see that, Dick.

      (COSENS looks in PROFESSOR’S creel, LUCY goes.)

      COSENS (to PROFESSOR). And is this all? (Holding up a small trout.)

      PROFESSOR. All! I should think it is all.

      COSENS. I thought you put the little ones back.

      PROFESSOR (taking fish). Little ones. It’s a halfpounder.

      COSENS. You don’t mind my smoking, do you, Miss Goodwillie?

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Oh no. Tom, give the Doctor one of your cigars.

      PROFESSOR. Eh! Oh yes.

      COSENS. Thank you.

      (PROFESSOR signs him ‘No.’ COSENS is perplexed.)

      MISS GOODWILLIE. YOU have them with you?

      PROFESSOR. Oh yes, I have them with me. (Finds them.)

      Ah, here they are.

      (Hands case to MISS GOODWILLIE who hands them to COSENS, still signing to him. COSENS takes one and puts it in his mouth.)

      MISS GOODWILLIE. I bought these for Tom.

      COSENS (hurriedly removing cigar from his mouth). Oh!

      MISS GOODWILLIE. Yes, he was actually paying fifty shillings a hundred for his cigars, and I got these for twelve and sixpence. They are quite as large, Tom. (Gives case to PROFESSOR.)

      PROFESSOR. СКАЧАТЬ