Broken Monsters. Lauren Beukes

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СКАЧАТЬ that he’d noticed, and got pissy.

      ‘You want to come here, get me up in the middle of the night? Best you have something to make up for that.’

      He felt sorry for her. All this need in the world. He tried to remember when he last slept.

      ‘It’s in the truck,’ he said, still hoping he could save this. ‘Lemme get it.’

      She rubbed her arms and stared out across the rows of empty bays to the store entrance. A street-cleaning machine was chugging along across the road.

      ‘You want my jacket, baby?’

      ‘I want the present and then you can go.’

      He pushed her a little. ‘No “how are you? Good to see you?”’

      ‘You wanna play like that? Okay. How are you, Clayton?’

      ‘Well, to tell you straight, Lou, I’m doing pretty bad. It’s the dreams again.’

      ‘Not this fourth-dimension shit again.’ She pinched down her arms, as if checking she was still there. ‘Ain’t nothing but your messed-up head.’

      ‘I don’t even have to be asleep. Sometimes I dream with my eyes open. I see things. Maybe some people are more open to it. I think some places the walls are thinner, like a cheap motel.’

      ‘You should probably go find one of those. I’m tired of talking. It’s late. I want to go back to sleep with my boy.’

      ‘No, wait, please, Lou. Lemme get his present, okay? Please. I came all this way.’ He went over to the truck and lifted it out of the footwell: a stout metal barrel made from an old muffler, with stumpy legs and a pointy head with pert ears and a snout. It still made him laugh to look at it. He turned, expecting her to share his delight. ‘Here. I made it specially for Charlie.’

      ‘What’s that s’posed to be?’

      ‘A dog. Every kid needs a dog. Look, it can bark and wag.’ He demonstrated the clever hinge he put in the jaw that opened and closed, the bouncy spring of the tail.

      ‘That don’t look like no dog I ever saw, Clayton Broom. That’ll put the fright into him. Probably cut himself on it, too.’

      ‘I smoothed off the edges, don’t worry. I wanted to let it oxidize so it would look like it had brown fur to match Charlie’s hair.’

      ‘He got red hair.’

      ‘You got red hair, baby.’ He laughed. ‘Right out of the bottle. Charlie takes after me. My hair was brown before it turned white.’

      ‘Don’t you know nothing?’ Her eyes went silvery with tears.

      ‘Hey, hey, baby, it’s okay.’ He tried to put his arms around her, but she shrank away.

      She used to laugh at his jokes. He’s sure she did. He told her the story about the cat in the cupboard and she laughed and laughed. The prettiest waitress at the diner, he told her, even if it was a lie. He offered to drive her home one night after work, stuck around until her shift was over, even helped her mop up the floor, turn the chairs around. He took her back to her place, where she knocked back a half-jack of vodka and cried on his shoulder about her shit-heel ex-husbands. Two already and her the wrong side of forty. He told her about the world under the world, and that scared her a little, but it made her come closer too. They were both lonely and afraid and there’s nothing wrong with what happened next. Only natural.

      ‘I want to see him, Lou,’ Clayton said.

      ‘He’s not here.’

      ‘Who’s in the back of the car then? Yoohoo, Charlie-boy!’ He waved at the little boy shape sitting up among the boxes and the lumpy bags. Two years old. Exactly the right age. He and Lou were together before she took off for Minneapolis with that Ryan guy. He’d done the math.

      ‘Mama?’ The car door swung open, and Charlie slid out, rubbing his eyes. Clayton filled up with unbearable pride at how beautiful he was, this little boy. Better than all his art. The masterpiece of human biology. It’s a goddamn miracle is what it is.

      ‘Charlie, it’s all right, sweetheart. Get back in the car. Go back to sleep.’

      ‘Who’s that?’

      Clayton stepped toward him, to ruffle his curls. ‘I’m your—’

      ‘No,’ she cut him off. ‘You and me, we did it once. Barely. Shit, I was so drunk.’

      ‘All it takes,’ Clayton said. ‘Birds and the bees, Daddy puts his penis in Mommy’s vagina, and the stork comes calling.’

      She covered the kid’s ears. ‘You don’t talk that way in front of him. He got red hair, you lunk. Like his dad. Like Ryan. He’s not yours, dummy.’

      The lace curtain on the RV twitched, a woman’s face peeked out.

      ‘No,’ he shook his head, hard. ‘That’s not true.’

      ‘I’m fucking telling you, you lunk. What’s wrong with you?’ She shoved at him again. Just like that little cat.

      ‘Don’t push me!’ He caught her skinny wrists, and Charlie let out a wail like a siren. It was all going wrong. Like everything always went wrong.

      He was blinded by a flashlight in his eyes.

      ‘Everything okay over here?’ It was a security guard.

      He let go of Lou’s wrists and shaded his eyes to be able to see the man. It’s got so he can’t trust in things to stay the way they’re supposed to be.

      ‘Everything’s fine, Wayne,’ Lou said, putting a flirty little kick in her voice. ‘But my friend hasn’t bought anything yet.’

      ‘I just got here,’ Clayton explained. ‘Five minutes ago.’

      ‘Sorry, sir, overnight parking is at the manager’s discretion.’

      ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

      ‘It means you gotta buy something,’ Lou said. She sounded sorry. She always had a temper. But it was gone as quick as it came. ‘It doesn’t matter what. It’ll take you five minutes. Then Wayne here will be happy and we can sit and talk. I promise.’

      ‘You on first-name basis with all the security guards round here?’

      ‘Wayne looks after us. You too, if you go buy something.’

      ‘Store policy, sir.’ The security guard puffed up.

      ‘All right, all right. I’m going. You want anything, Lou baby?’

      ‘Um …’ she said, looking at the bright door across the parking lot.

      ‘Cigarettes?’ he offered. ‘An Energade? A pop or something for Charlie?’

      She swiped at her eyes, rubbed the back of СКАЧАТЬ