By the Time You Read This. Lola Jaye

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СКАЧАТЬ a good guy, he’ll respect you and your wishes. Remember my bit on boys, hormones and teabags? This doesn’t really go away, sweetheart, so always have that in mind. Admittedly, when it comes to you, I’m absolutely no use in these matters… So it’s probably better to talk to your mum about this stuff…

      I tensed up at the mention of Mum, knowing I’d rather place toothpicks in my eyes than talk to her about Corey

      …. She’ll know more about this stuff than me. Or perhaps you can talk to your best friend about it. Whoever you have, please talk. It’s a great way to see things more clearly.

      That night as I struggled with homework, my mind was consumed with Corey. Things we’d do together. How he made me feel. Contrary to what Dad had said on the subject, being mates for so long had to count for something. And not having to sneak around any more would mean holding hands, being together… I wondered if I should just ask him out on a date. A proper date, to mark the very first day of going public.

      Miscellaneous: Is it ever okay to ask out a boy? Yes.

      I think times have changed since my day (yes, you heard right – I’m sounding like MY dad!). But, remember, there’s a good and bad way to do it and it can be a bit tricky. Just try to be subtle, and after you’ve got the first bit out of the way: i.e. ‘Would you like to go and see a film?’, let the boy choose the film. Or if it’s to a burger bar, let him choose which one. We do still like to remain man-like, you know. Nevertheless, don’t listen to anyone who says a boy never wants to be asked out by a girl. That’s complete and utter rubbish! It’s so rare for a girl to ask out a guy, so when you do, he’ll be chuffed, trust me on that. Go for it, girl – he’d be mad to turn you down anyway!

      *

      Armed with a sudden bout of confidence, I called round at Carla’s the next day, to be greeted by her very tearful mother clutching a tissue.

      ‘Is everything okay?’ I asked with a shot of alarm. My mind produced a horrible image of Carla or Corey lying dead on a slab.

      ‘No!’ she sniffed, followed by a loud blow of the nose. My heart rate accelerated as I entered the living room. Luckily, Corey was alive and punching the air while Carla playfully ruffled what was left of her father’s receding hair. Nothing unusual there.

      ‘Corey’s been accepted to some fancy art college!’ said Carla nonchalantly.

      I turned to Corey. ‘Congrats!’ I wanted to jump into his arms and plant wet kisses on every inch of his face. I contained myself.

      ‘Cheers, Lo Bag.’

      ‘You must be so happy. I know this is what you’ve wanted.’

      ‘Yes…but…’

      ‘Have you told her where it is?’ sniffed Carla’s mum.

      ‘Don’t upset yourself, it’s for the best,’ offered her husband.

      ‘Where is it?’

      ‘Bloody France!’ said Carla.

      I looked to Corey for some type of credible explanation, but all he returned was a lop-sided, almost drunken smile, perhaps lost in a world of self-congratulation.

      ‘France?’ I willed the carpet to open up with a Lois-sized hole and swallow me into it, but of course it didn’t. Instead I listened to Carla’s mum crying at the injustice of it all, as I fought the urge to join her.

      ‘That’s great! Really great. I’m really happy for you,’ I managed to mumble instead.

      ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered a few moments later as I stood in his corridor.

      ‘No big deal, Corey,’ I whispered back softly, before making my way home.

      In my bedroom, I easily located the cassette Corey had given me for my thirteenth birthday and placed it in my portable cassette player. I pressed play and listened to track two of LL Cool J’s album. ‘Around the Way Girl’ flooded my earlobes.

      My favourite.

      * * *

       Do as I Say, Not as I Did

      Kevin Trivia: I truly felt I’d become a man after watching Shaft with Charlie at the Coronet. A classic.

      My baby’s eighteen! Yeah! Even though you probably thought so five years ago, it’s now official – you’re a woman. How does it feel?

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