Josephine Cox 3-Book Collection 2: The Loner, Born Bad, Three Letters. Josephine Cox

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СКАЧАТЬ Davie told his story.

      He described how his mother had torn the family apart, and how, when they were homeless, his grandfather put them up. ‘And not for the first time,’ he told Eli. ‘Y’see, Mam got mixed up in things … men and booze mostly. But it wasn’t her fault. She was weak – she told me that herself. Her own mam was the same, and so I suppose it was in the blood.’

      The telling was a difficult thing for Davie. All this time since leaving Blackburn, he had not spoken of it to a living soul. And now, with every word he uttered, it seemed as though he was unlocking a door that he had once firmly shut.

      ‘The last time was the worst ever.’ He relived the scene. ‘We waited all night for her. Dad even went out looking, but he couldn’t find her. She came home in the early hours, out of her mind with booze – in a terrible state, she was. Dad was waiting and he tried to reason with her, but she wouldn’t listen. Then he told her he was leaving, that she would never change and he couldn’t live like that any more.’

      When the memories became too much and the emotion choked him to silence, Eli reached out and touched him on the shoulder. ‘Go on, son,’ he urged kindly. ‘Sometimes it’s good to get things out in the open. If you keep ’em buried deep, they’ll only drive you crazy.’

      It seemed like an age before Davie got up from the table and began pacing the floor, head bent and his heart aching. ‘She tried to stop him from leaving, but he wouldn’t listen. He’d had enough. I thought he was being too cruel, but I’ve thought about it a lot, and I’ve come to realise how he must have felt.’

      ‘So your dad left, did he, son?’

      ‘Yes.’ Davie nodded. ‘Before he went, they had an argument on the stairs. Grandad was there … he lashed out in anger. Mam was fighting and unsteady, and then she just fell … tumbled all the way down the stairs. Dad tried to help her but she wouldn’t let him. She seemed all right though … not hurt or bleeding or anything like that.’

      In his mind’s eye he could see it all happening, every small detail, hear every angry word. ‘Grandad told her to go and stay with one of her boozy friends, because he was too old and frail to put up with her any more. He wanted me to stay, but I wouldn’t. I wanted to be with her. We went to this man’s house … she thought he would put us up, but he told us to clear off, that he wanted nothing to do with her.’ Shamed, he bowed his head, and for a moment it seemed he might not go any further.

      Coming back to the table, he sat down without a word. After a while, he looked up at the older man, his eyes haggard and tearful, and his heart turning over and over. ‘Mam said we should go to the church – that someone would help us there. We got as far as the woods,’ he whispered, ‘when … she …’ He dropped his gaze and composed himself. ‘She died, Eli,’ he said in a heartbreaking tone. ‘My mam died, and there was nothing I could do.’

      Suddenly, he covered his face with his arms and began to sob.

      ‘My mam died,’ he kept saying. ‘She left me – and there was nothing I could do … nothing.’

      Wisely, Eli made no move. Instead, he let Davie cry it all out. He watched and waited, and his old heart wept alongside the boy.

      After a while, Davie wiped his face and gave a long, shuddering sigh. ‘I’m sorry, Eli. I’ve always been able to keep it inside before.’

      Eli brushed aside his apology. ‘Then it’s time you let it all out,’ he said gently. ‘No man can bear such grief on his own, let alone a young ’un like you.’

      Feeling as though he had shed a great weight from his shoulders, Davie went on, ‘For almost two years I went from place to place – looking for my dad, I think. I never settled anywhere, was always on the run, not knowing where I was going, or even who I was any more.’

      ‘And did you find your father?’

      Davie shook his head. ‘No. I even went to Ireland, but it was like looking for a needle in a haystack.’ He recalled the long, weary days when he trudged the streets asking questions and getting no answers. ‘It’s as though he disappeared from the face of the earth.’

      ‘And then you found your way here.’ Eli felt privileged that Davie was confiding in him.

      Davie nodded. ‘I couldn’t stay with any job for more than two minutes,’ he confessed. ‘I just kept moving. Sometimes I didn’t even know where I was.’ He took a moment to relive those awful times. ‘I became a thief, Eli,’ he said shamefully. ‘I stole food and clothes, and once I nearly got caught by the police. Then I got in with a bad lot. One night they promised me a lot of money to go with them and help break into this big house … The owner was away, they said … A pig of a man, they reckoned. They claimed that one of them had been beaten black and blue by him – put into hospital for weeks, they said.’

      ‘I see.’ Eli recognised how they were probably just using Davie – taking advantage of his situation. ‘Older than you, were they?’

      Davie nodded. ‘By a good many years, I should say.’ But he wasn’t excusing his own part in what happened. ‘I knew they were up to no good,’ he assured Eli. ‘But it didn’t seem to matter at the time.’

      ‘So you went with them, did you?’ he asked. ‘You broke into this man’s house while he was away?’

      Davie sighed. ‘It all went horribly wrong. Mr Graham hadn’t gone away at all; nor, as it turned out, was he an ogre. I found out later that he’d chased one of them off when he caught them hanging about the back of the house. So they had decided to teach him a lesson. They knew he’d be there, all right.’

      ‘What happened?’

      ‘They dragged him out of bed and beat him terribly, and when I tried to stop them, they set about me. Some time later, when I came round, the old man was lying on the floor … scarcely breathing.’ Davie had a lump in his throat, recalling the panic he had felt at the sight of the old man sprawled beside him. ‘There was blood everywhere.’

      ‘So, what did you do?’

      ‘I tried to help him, but he was so still, and he was cold. I put a blanket round him, but I didn’t really know what I was doing. They’d kicked me in the head and I couldn’t see out of one eye. I kept vomiting, too. Eli, I just lost my wits. I was terrified! I ran … I just ran through the house, and as I shot out of the door, the police were everywhere.’

      At first he couldn’t understand why they were there. ‘I thought a neighbour must have called them, then I wondered if the others had shopped me. I tried to get away, but they caught me. I told them what had happened, but they said I’d have plenty of time to explain myself in court. They took my name and then they threw me into the car and drove me to the police station.’

      ‘And when you went to court, they believed you, is that it?’

      Davie shook his head, wincing. ‘I never went to court. I jumped out of the car when we got to the police station. I could hear them shouting for me to stop, but I kept going … I just ran and ran, until I couldn’t hear them any more.’

      Eli was shocked that Davie could have gone along with those thugs, and even more saddened by the fact that a man had probably died. ‘Dear God, Davie, what were you thinking of? You should never have run away. The best thing would have been for you to tell the court exactly what you’ve СКАЧАТЬ