Ptomaine Street: The Tale of Warble Petticoat. Wells Carolyn

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      But here on the terrace of the simple little hewn stone station were hordes of men and women who seemed to be, mentally, morally and physically, literally butterflies.

      “Isn’t there any way of waking them up?” she begged of Petticoat, grabbing his arm and shaking him.

      “These guys? Wake ‘em up? What for? They’re happy.”

      “But they’re so smug—no, that isn’t what I mean. They’re so stick-in-the-mud.”

      “Look here, Warble, you want to get over your fool idea that because a woman is slender she isn’t adorable. These folks are up to date, snuff and mischief.”

      “I know, that’s what’s biting me. Life seems so hard for them.”

      “Oh, they don’t mind it. Now you must meet the bunch. They’re all down here to meet their husbands or something just as good. Now you behave yourself.”

      “Yop.”

      She had a grip on herself. She was ready to kiss and be friends with them all. But she was scared at the rackety pack who ballyhooed like Coney Island and surged down upon her like a Niagara Falls.

      She had the impression that all the men had soft voices, large, embracing arms, gimlet eyes and bored, impersonal smiles. She knew they were taking her in. Their pleasant hoots and yells of greeting overcame her.

      “Oh, pleathe—pleathe,” she lisped.

      In her fresh frilled dimity and soft sash of baby-blue Surah, her rolled white socks disclosing but a few tantalizing inches of seashell-pink calf, Warble stood, eyes cast down, a pretty, foolish thing,

      and, to a man, the male population of Butterfly Center fell for her.

      Not so the remainder of the citizens.

      One of the men was yelling at Petticoat:

      “Hop into my car, Bill, Don’t see yours—I’ll tote the bride-person you’ve got there—with joy and gladness.” Warble looked at the yeller.

      “Can’t quite place me, chick, can you?” he grinned at her. “Well I’m only old Goldwin Leathersham—no use for me in the world but to spend money. Want me to spend some on you? Here’s my old thing—step up here, Marigold, and be introduced. She’s really nicer than she looks, Mrs. Petticoat.”

      “Indeed I’m not,” Marigold Leathersham cried gaily, “I couldn’t be—nobody could be!”

      She came running—a beautiful, slim young woman, with a wealth of expensive looking gold hair, white and gold teeth that broke into a lavish smile. Her voice was rich and though she looked above, away from and through Warble, yet she saw her.

      “So glad to welcome you, you pretty baby,” she chirruped. “You’re going to love us all, aren’t you?”

      “Yop,” said Warble, and smiled her engaging smile.

      “You bet she’ll love us,” declared Leathersham, “she’ll make the world go round! Hello, Little One,” he turned to pat the cheek of a white-haired, red-faced old lady, who hawk-eyed and hawk-nosed, stood by, listening in. “This, Mrs. Petticoat, is our Lady Bountiful, Mrs. Charity Givens—noted for her generosity. She ostentatiously heads all Donation Lists, and she’s going to start a rest cure where your husband’s unsuccessful cases may die in peace. And here’s one of the cases. Hello, Iva Payne!”

      “Hello,” languidly responded a girl like a long pale lily—a Burne-Jones type, who sometimes carried around a small stained-glass window to rest her head against.

      “Are you really Bill’s wife?” she asked, a little disinterestedly, of Warble.

      “Yop,” said Warble, and made a face at her.

      “How quaint,” said Iva.

      “Whoopee, Baby! Here we are,” and Petticoat rescued his bride from the middle of a crowd and yanked her toward his car.

      The car was a museum piece, and as Warble caromed into its cushions she felt that her lines had fallen in pleasant places.

      That was the way Fate came to Warble. In big fat chunks, in slathers. Unexpected, sudden, inescapable—that’s Fate all over.

      “I shall like Mr. Leathersham—I shall call him Goldie. They’re all nice and friendly—the men. But this town! Oh, my Heavens! This Jewel Casket—this Treasure Table! I can’t live through it! This Floating Island of a Tipsy Charlotte!” Her husband nudged her. “You look like you had a pain,” he said; “Scared? I don’t expect you to fit in at first. You have to get eased into things. It’s different from Pittsburgh. But you’ll come to like it—love is so free here, and the smartest people on earth.”

      She winked at him. “I love you for your misunderstanding. I’m just dog-tired. And too many chocolates. Give me a rest, dear. I’m all in from wear sheeriness.”

      She laid her feet in his lap and snuggled into the corner of the pearl-colored upholstery.

      She was ready for her new home, beautiful, celebrated Ptomaine Haul. Petticoat told her that his mother had been living with him, but had fled incontinently on hearing a description of Warble.

      The bride chuckled and smiled engagingly as the car slithered round a corner and stopped under the porte cochère of a great house set in the midst of a landscape.

      Neo-Colonial, of a purity unsurpassed by the Colonists themselves.

      A park stretching in front; gardens at the back; steps up to a great porch, and a front door copied from the Frary house in Old Deerfield.

      A great hall—at its back twin halves of a perfect staircase. To the right, a charming morning room, where Petticoat led his bride.

      “You like it? It’s not inharmonious. I left it as it is—in case you care to rebuild or redecorate.”

      “It’s a sweet home—” she was touched by his indifference. “So artistic.”

      Petticoat winced, but he was a polite chap, and he only said, carelessly, “Yes, home is where the art is,” and let it go at that.

      In the hall and the great library she was conscious of vastness and magnificent distances, but, she thought, if necessary, I can use roller skates.

      As she followed Petticoat and the current shift of servants upstairs, she quavered to herself like the fat little gods of the hearth.

      She took her husband into her arms, and felt that at last she had realized her one time dreams of the moving pictures, ay, even to the final close-up.

      What mattered, so long as she could paw at the satin back of his shirt, and admire his rich and expensive clothing.

      “Dear—so dear—” she murmured.

      CHAPTER IV

      “The Leathershams are giving a ball for us to-night,” Petticoat said, casually, as he powdered his nose in the recesses of his triplicate СКАЧАТЬ