Three.. Goran Segedinac

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      Knowing that he had no idea where they were was making it even worse. His mind, and everything that he learned during school were telling him one thing, but the reality was completely different. They were lost.

      They were getting tired, especially Dugi. He started hallucinating that he was being haunted by those killed. The water they had gathered had a strange taste, as if the land were poisoned. After what seemed like an eternity of walking aimlessly around the circles, he finally woke up in a new place. He feared that they got trapped, and hoped that they were saved. But, that was quickly changed by one awful thought.

      He was tied to the wooden table by dirty sheets. Dugi was on the table, and the oven was beside him. The old woman was at the oven. She laughed when she saw him wake, so she approached him and shoved a glass in his face, making him drink. He couldn’t stop looking at the soldier who had been ripped apart. He recognized his hand, his tattoo on his upper arm, and his uniform. She puts the pieces in a cauldron and laughs, satisfied.

      “Eat, so I won’t have to kill you too. “

      To show him she was serious, she broke his little finger. His circulation was weak because of the sheets he was tied with, but the pain ran through his whole body. He felt his heart beating like crazy; all he ever wanted was to make it stop. There was only one way. He chewed, then spit it out. More pain. He turned his head. Pain. In the end, he swallowed it.

      “That’s it, my darling. Just keep on eating.“

      Streets are full of young people: couples, singles, mostly drunk, who want to have a really good time, and be happy. If he manages to find her, maybe his mood would get better, too. The pub in front of him was famous, and brought even more beautiful memories.

      “Kiss me again,“ Sandra said, looking at him with half-opened eyes. He laughs, and moves his lips closer to hers before blowing into the mug, sprinkling her with froth.

      “Get away, asshole!“

      She was laughing and hitting him. Then she put her hand in his and got closer quickly. He kissed her for a long time. His Sandra. He was aware of his happiness, and he hoped he would never get to know the things that might ruin it.

      There were two guys standing at their familiar place. They are making a toast. No trace of her. He searched the semi-dark privé, bar, chairs; peeked into the women’s bathroom. A crying teenage girl looked at him angrily.

      “Get away, this is for women!“

      “Excuse me.“

      He stepped onto the street. He must search for her. It would be easier if he knew where she lived now. She was never keen on technology. She left the letter in the mailbox, after he would hang up on her for the hundredth time, or he would spy on her through the door hole, every time she would try to sort things out between them. Every time she would even try to make conversation with him.

      Her scent was inside the pink envelope. The ring falls out on the floor, and the sound of paper unwrapping, revealing what’s inside.

      Egg.

      Dugi was partially eaten. She was grinding what was left of him and putting it in jars. He helped her. She had dozens of it.

      He has no strength to oppose her. She has complete control over him. He doesn’t know how, but he feels it. She untied him a long time ago. She lets him take a walk. The village was peaceful and untouched, a curtain moving here and now, but no signs of people. He doesn’t think about running away. If he walks away more than he can, he feels her claws on his neck and returns back. Then he eats, and he falls asleep, in case he doesn’t have to help in the kitchen.

      Egg.

      That night she woke him up, and gave him a roll of paper. He unwrapped it and looked at her, surprised.

      “If you break it you, I will kill you,“ she told him. “When you get out of here, just go straight, until you reach the first crossroad. You’ll then know where to go next. You’ll recognize the house. Go inside the courtyard and bury him at the doorstep. Don’t worry, there’s no one there now, but the housekeeper will return soon. You will use this black magic on them.”

      He reached his goal without problems, exactly the way the old woman said. It was a big house, obvious that it used to be a rich house. He dug a hole with his own hands, and buried him carefully. He seemed to hear some voices, just as Dugi used to hear them. But there was nothing around him.

      The old woman was satisfied. She caressed him.

      “Bravo, my son. Bravo, my dear.”

      He was shaking his head, a bit angry for the fact that he cannot forget her. His memories had many layers, and were profound; he would be the happiest if those war memories ceased. Then he could think about her without any trouble. It was too difficult this way.

      There was no egg in Sandra’s paper, only words. Difficult words that he had read so many times before. They were putting him in too much pain, but he was unable to cry.

      “My love,

      I hope you will be decent enough to read these lines. I don’t know what happened. I can understand the war, I can try to imagine the horror it brings. I also understand that you don’t want me anymore, but I don’t understand how you can’t look at me or speak to me.

      I waited for you, patiently and with pride. I was jealousy saving every emotion, imagining the moment you will come back into my life. However, it never happened. Not the way I wanted it, but the way it should have been.

      I can write to you about what I have went through, about terrible things such as the war itself, which were happening here. I will not do it, I don’t feel like doing it anymore.

      I am writing this to you, since I can’t leave you alone, in silence. I am giving you back the ring, hoping that one day you will have strength to give it to someone else. I wish this for you, from the bottom of my heart, with the same passion I had when I wanted to carry it on my hand forever.

      I sold the apartment yesterday. There were too many things that reminded me of you. I fantasized about us in every corner of it; waiting for you to come to my door, getting ready for our dates in the city. It was full of our past. My dad died, you have probably heard about it, so the apartment was, anyway, too big for me. The way things are now, we will never be in it together.

      I won’t be giving you my new address. I’m not angry. I just don’t want to hope anymore. It’s over.

      I wish you a lot of luck in your life.

      S. “

      He didn’t even think about blaming her for what he made her do. He used to comfort himself for a while, while the magic of the blues still worked –– that that was the best for her. Yet, he knew deep in his soul that the day when he will have to find her will come.

      Where could she possibly go?

      Somewhere around two in the morning, he became aware of the unpleasant possibility of failure. Only strong military will was making him continue with his chase. Cafes, clubs, he was going to them regularly to scan the guests. He wasn’t afraid of rushing, it wasn’t hard to СКАЧАТЬ