The Sweeping Saga Collection: Poppy’s Dilemma, The Dressmaker’s Daughter, The Factory Girl. Nancy Carson

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СКАЧАТЬ like a kitten and submitted willingly to his kisses, which she found mesmerising. She stayed like that for half an hour, though it seemed significantly less, enjoying his warm affection, wringing as much innocent pleasure out of it as she was able. Poppy felt herself tingling in the most surprising places. She was peeved at being robbed of the intensifying pleasure when he stopped and said that maybe they should get on with more work.

      ‘Oh, sod the work,’ she carped.

      ‘No, Poppy.’ It was the most difficult thing in the world to say no right then, to deny himself, let alone Poppy, this intimacy he’d secretly yearned for. ‘Lord knows what might happen if we lose control of ourselves.’

      ‘What can happen that neither of us don’t want to happen?’ she asked, baffled at this shattering and unaccountable self-denial of his. ‘Don’t you want me?’

      ‘Oh, yes,’ he said and there was no mistaking the truth of it. ‘I want you.’

      ‘So, am I your girl now?’

      He laughed ruefully. ‘Just a few short weeks ago you told me you weren’t prepared to devote yourself to anybody.’

      ‘But you never asked me to be your girl, Robert. I would have been, gladly … If you’d asked.’

      He emitted a profound sigh. ‘I’m afraid it’s not as cut and dried as that.’

      ‘But you like me, don’t you? You must do. You asked to kiss me.’

      ‘Poppy …’ He looked down into the folds of her skirt as she sat in his lap, her warm weight a pleasure. ‘I do like you. I like you much more than I care to admit. But there are other considerations. I don’t just want to take advantage of you.’

      ‘You wouldn’t be.’

      ‘Yes, I would, and it wouldn’t be fair … Oh, Poppy … I could so easily—’

      ‘So easily what?’ she interrupted emotionally, tears filling her eyes. ‘Take advantage of me, you mean?’

      He shook his head. ‘No, not take advantage. Didn’t I just say that’s the last thing I want to do? No – I mean, I could so easily fall in love with you.’

      ‘Then why don’t you?’ she answered with her young girl’s logic. ‘I’d fall in love with you, then you could take advantage of me all you liked. I’d want you to.’

      He groaned inwardly. Here, unexpectedly before him, was the promise of heavenly bliss with this girl, and he must surrender it, ignore it as if it wasn’t there. ‘I don’t think you understand, Poppy.’

      ‘Oh, I think I do,’ said she, as the light of realisation hit her. She got up from his lap and slumped down in the chair she had occupied before. ‘You’re a clever engineer, a real swell, and invited out to slap-up dinners, you say, whereas I’m just a common navvy’s daughter who could never be anything but that.’

      ‘No, Poppy.’

      ‘Oh, yes, Robert,’ she sighed. ‘I admit I’ve harboured feelings for you ever since I met you, but I’m daft, aren’t I, to have thought I could ever be anything other than a navvy’s wench?’

      ‘You can be whatever you want to be, Poppy,’ he said sincerely.

      ‘But not your girl …’

      He did not answer.

      She took a rag out of the pocket of her skirt and wiped her tears. ‘Unless I suddenly become a lady, eh? I stand no chance unless I suddenly become a lady with airs and graces, and can look down my nose at everybody beneath me. Well, I’ll never be like that, Robert. I could never be. It ain’t in me. You have to take me as I am or not at all.’

      ‘I would rather take you as you are, Poppy, believe me …’ He hated to see tears in her eyes. She was hurt and he was responsible. He was sorry and all he wanted right then was to hold her, to comfort her.

      She stood up, agitated. ‘No, there’s too much of a gap between you and me. Everywhere you went you’d be ashamed of me. Oh, I understand your difficulty, Robert, but I could never be content neither, thinking I was never good enough for you.’

      ‘You must never belittle yourself, Poppy.’ He stood up and moved towards her, compelled to put his hands to her slender waist. ‘I think you’re the kindest, most sensitive, prettiest soul I’ve ever met.’ His tone was a taut thread of emotion. ‘I can’t get you out of my mind. That’s the trouble. And it’s driving me mad, Poppy. What am I to do?’

      She rested her head against his shoulder as if all the troubles of the world had come to roost on hers. Her eyes were still watery at this unexpected admission of love that had exploded between them all of a sudden, like gelignite going off.

      ‘I don’t know,’ she answered. ‘But why should there be such a big to-do about it? I don’t get it. If two people like each other enough …’

      ‘Dear God …’ he said quietly, his heart heavy. ‘The problem is, you see, Poppy, it’s not that there is a social divide between us. I’m sure that would be bridgeable, for the will to either bridge it or ignore it would indeed be there. It’s just that …’ He hesitated, unsure as to whether to confess his predicament … but, hang it all, he had to, otherwise he was being dishonest … ‘It’s just that I’m already engaged to be married. Yet how I wish I weren’t …’

      ‘You’re engaged already?’ The possibility had never crossed her mind before. ‘Who to? No, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know who she is.’

      ‘She’s a very respectable girl. I imagine you’d like her.’

      ‘I’m sure I wouldn’t.’

      ‘No, maybe you wouldn’t.’

      ‘I know I wouldn’t. I’d like to punch her nose.’

      ‘Oh, Poppy, please don’t talk like a navvy.’

      ‘Well, if you’re engaged, you shouldn’t see me again,’ she said resignedly. ‘Maybe it’d be best to stop my lessons.’

      ‘Do you want to stop your lessons?’ He was sorry that he had put her unorthodox education in jeopardy by his amorous behaviour.

      ‘No, why should I?’ she answered defiantly. ‘You’re teaching me to read and write and I’m learning well. I know I am. Why should I stop now just because you’re engaged, just because there’s another girl you’re fond of? I’ll just have to stop liking you like that. Did you know all along how much I liked you?’

      He could have hugged her for her kittenish simplicity, her lack of guile, her direct use of simple words. ‘From the outset I hoped you did. I hoped with all my heart that you did.’

      ‘So why don’t you just give up this girl you’re engaged to, if you’d rather have me? It’s seems the best thing to do.’

      ‘But I’m promised, Poppy. I knew her long before I met you. Her family and mine are close friends. We are due to be married next year. A man can’t renege on a promise to marry. It’s a question of honour. The girl has to release him from СКАЧАТЬ