Mum On The Run. Fiona Gibson

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       Chapter Three

      ‘Mum broke her foot today,’ Grace announces over dinner.

      ‘Aww,’ Toby says. ‘Poor Mummy.’

      ‘You mean she pretended to break it,’ Finn cuts in, carving grooves in his mashed potato with his fork. ‘Dad, didn’t she take the bandage off as soon as she got home and start walking normally? She was totally putting it on.’ He takes a noisy slurp of his orange juice and bangs his glass on the table.

      ‘Well, yes,’ chuckles Jed.

      I glance down, checking that I still exist. Yep, all evidence suggests that I am a functioning human being with a beating heart and everything.

      ‘Why?’ Toby asks, wide-eyed, twirling a fork through his still-blond curls.

      ‘To make people feel sorry for her,’ Finn replies, ‘because she’s . . .’

      ‘Excuse me,’ I butt in. ‘I am here, you know. You don’t need to talk about me as if I’m somewhere else.’

      ‘Like hospital,’ Finn mutters.

      I shoot him a look and push my shepherd’s pie aside, unable to face another mouthful. ‘I know it sounds stupid,’ I start, ‘but I didn’t mean for that to happen. You see, I was dizzy and confused – concussed maybe . . .’ I refrain from adding: and you know what? If it hadn’t been for the shock of seeing your darling father and that teacher woman, prodding each other on the sports field, I would never have fallen in the first place.

      ‘Were you really concussed?’ Jed sniggers.

      ‘It’s not funny, Jed. It’s one of the most embarrassing things that’s ever happened to me.’ I eye the pea which Toby has flicked off his plate, and which is now rolling steadily towards the table’s edge. It drops off, lands on the floor and trundles towards the cooker.

      ‘And me,’ Finn adds. ‘It was embarrassing for me as well. Everyone was pointing and laughing . . .’ He tosses his head so his dark, heavy fringe falls over his eyes.

      ‘Were they?’ I ask, appalled.

      ‘Oh, come on, honey.’ Jed smiles and reaches for my hand across the table. ‘Maybe you’re just not built for speed.’

      ‘What are you saying, Jed?’ I blink at him furiously. It’s okay for him; he’s still in excellent shape. Taut tummy, toned legs, infuriatingly firm butt. He even has his own hair and teeth.

      ‘Just that . . . your talents lie in other areas.’ He grins cheekily, trying to lighten the mood.

      ‘And what areas might they be?’

      He pauses. I can virtually hear his brain whirring as he tries to dredge up evidence of my brilliance. ‘All the, er, stuff you do,’ he says, glancing in desperation at the children. ‘Doesn’t Mum do lots for you?’

      Grace nods eagerly. ‘She packs our lunchboxes.’

      ‘She wipes my bum,’ Toby says approvingly, flicking another pea off his plate.

      ‘You should be doing that for yourself by now,’ Jed mutters.

      ‘He can’t wipe his bum!’ Grace titters. ‘Dirty boy with a dirty bum . . .’

      ‘I’m not dirty,’ Toby roars, and furious tears spring into his eyes.

      ‘Can I stop having cheese sandwiches in my lunchbox?’ Finn cuts in.

      ‘Okay,’ I say lightly, ‘but what would you like instead? You said you didn’t want ham, tuna, salami, chicken or beef . . . and didn’t you complain that the egg ones were smelly? It’s tricky to think of stuff you do like, Finn. Maybe you should start having school dinners?’

      ‘I just don’t like cheese, okay?’ He shudders dramatically, as if I’ve just tried to force-feed him a pilchard. ‘Ham is fine, I suppose,’ he adds, ‘but not the cheap stuff you usually buy.’

      ‘What on earth’s wrong with our ham?’

      ‘It’s kinda . . . wet. And see when you cut my sandwiches? Instead of two fat rectangles could you cut them in triangles like the ones in shops? That’s what James’s mum does.’

      I hold his gaze. This is what my life has become. Not only am I not built for speed, I can’t even make an acceptable sandwich. Not like James’s mum does anyway. James’s mum who has a nanny even though she doesn’t work. ‘Would that be an isosceles triangle?’ I enquire. ‘Or would you prefer an equilateral or, um . . . that other kind I can’t remember the name of?’

      Finn scowls. ‘Scalene. It’s called scalene, I learned that when I was eight, Mum. Didn’t you get that at school?’

      ‘No, I only got taught how to pick things up off the floor and wipe arses,’ I growl.

      ‘Uh?’ Finn barks.

      ‘I only asked because I might need to borrow your protractor to cut them really accurately.’ I smile brightly, aware of Jed’s caustic gaze.

      ‘For God’s sake,’ he snaps. ‘It’s time you all stopped being so fussy. Mum has enough on her plate without these ridiculous demands.’

      ‘Yes, she does,’ I shout, even though I feel physically ill when people refer to themselves in the third person.

      ‘I’m not fussy,’ Grace protests. ‘I think you make nice lunches, Mummy.’

      ‘Thank СКАЧАТЬ