The Loner. Josephine Cox

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      ‘I’ll write,’ Davie said, as he clambered out of the window.

      ‘Promise?’

      His promise was the smile he gave her. And then he was gone.

      CHAPTER SEVEN

      ‘SO, THIS IS where you’ve been hiding out, is it?’ Beth said angrily, hands on hips. ‘What on earth d’you think you’re playing at, Judy? You’ve had me almost out of my mind with worry. It’s a good job I didn’t wake your father and have him going crazy! The poor man needs his rest after yesterday’s shenanigans.’

      Tutting and fretting, but greatly relieved at finding the girl, she queried, ‘I thought you didn’t like the spiders in the barn – so what are you doing out here in the cold, at this time of morning?’

      ‘Davie was here,’ Judy said simply.

      ‘Davie? Thank God he’s safe.’ Beth looked about. ‘Where is he? I’m going to give him a big breakfast and a bit o’ comfort, poor lad.’

      ‘He’s gone.’

      ‘What – back to his grandad?’

      ‘No. I don’t know where he’s gone.’ It only now occurred to Judy that he had not mentioned any particular direction.

      Beth was frantic. ‘Is he all right? What did he say? Why didn’t you wake us? Your father would have driven him home.’

      ‘That’s why we didn’t wake you,’ the girl explained. ‘Because he didn’t want to go back there.’

      Beth considered that for a moment. ‘I see. He can’t forgive Joseph for throwing him out, is that it?’

      ‘No. He’s already forgiven him. Look.’ She held out the letter. ‘He wrote this to his grandad. He wants me to take it to him.’

      Beth nodded. ‘I’m glad for that at least,’ she said. ‘But how did you know Davie was here?’

      ‘While I was pulling my curtains last night, I thought I saw a movement over by the barn, but I wasn’t sure. And then I eventually decided it must have been him, so I came out, and there he was, making himself a bed in the hay.’

      ‘So you helped him, did you, lass?’

      ‘Yes. I made him a snack and gave him food for the journey. I hope you don’t mind, Mam. He was so hungry and thirsty.’

      Beth gave her an emotional hug and thanked God for this kindly child.

      ‘You’re a good friend, Judy. And so now he’s gone, eh?’

      ‘Yes, Mam.’

      ‘And you don’t know where he’s headed?’

      ‘No.’ If only she knew, she might be more content. ‘I don’t think Davie knows either. He said he wanted to make a life for himself and not be a trouble to anybody.’ She recalled his words. ‘‘‘I need to prove myself’’, that’s what he said.’

      Beth gave a long, deep sigh. ‘Well, it’s understandable. His whole world’s been turned upside down…I expect he needs to think his way through it all. He’s nobbut a lad still and being on his own, he’ll find the world more of a hostile place than he ever imagined.’ The motherly woman believed he would have a change of mind once he was out there in the big wide world. ‘I’ll give him a week,’ she said confidently, ‘afore he starts heading back.’

      Sliding her arm round Judy’s shoulders, she drew her away, but then, catching a sniff of the girl’s clothes, she pulled back. ‘By ’eck, you stink to high heaven, lass!’ she exclaimed. ‘Anybody’d think you’d been sleeping with the old shire!’

      When they got back to the house, Tom was up and at it. He had washed, dressed, and was already across the yard to feed the chickens. ‘I’m off to see whether that damn fox has been at my birds,’ he shouted to them. ‘If there’s any damage, the old sod won’t get away with it this time!’ He patted the shotgun slung over his arm. ‘I’ll be good and ready if he shows up.’

      ‘Be careful with that thing!’ Beth nagged him. She had never liked the shotgun. ‘Like as not you’ll get excited and shoot your toes clean off.’

      ‘Away with you, woman,’ he called back. ‘There’s nobody can handle a shotgun better than Thomas Makepeace!’ With that he strode away, hellbent on a confrontation.

      Inside the house, Beth set about cooking breakfast while Judy went off to get washed and dressed.

      When the bacon and mushrooms were simmering nicely and still there was no sign of her daughter, Beth turned off the gas, covered the pan and went up to her room.

      Judy was curled up on the windowseat, looking dreamily out across the land. ‘Thanks, Mam, but I don’t really want any breakfast,’ she said.

      ‘Don’t want your breakfast!’ Beth was astonished. ‘But you’re allus ready for your breakfast. During the day you don’t eat as much as I would like you to, but you love your Sunday breakfast. I’ve cooked those new mushrooms your dad brought home. By! They smell right tasty. Come on now, Judy, get yourself downstairs, afore they spoil.’ ‘I’m not hungry this morning, Mam.’ Concerned, Beth came to sit beside her. ‘What is it, my love?’ She had an instinct that only a mother could feel. ‘What’s ailing you?’ ‘Nothing. I’m just not hungry, that’s all.’ Beth persisted. ‘Don’t give me that. I know you far too well, and I can see there’s more to it than that. Something’s worrying you. Whatever it is, you know you can always talk to me.’ Of course Judy would be worried about young Davie. But this was a deeper mood, and it wasn’t in the girl’s nature to be so sad.

      There was a long pause, during which Judy wondered if her mammy could really understand the feelings that were burning inside her. ‘Mam?’

      ‘Yes?’

      ‘If I ask you something, you won’t laugh at me, will you?’

      ‘Now, why would I do that, eh?’

      ‘Well…’ Embarrassed, she fell momentarily silent.

      ‘Go on, lass.’

      Another, longer pause, then, ‘Mam?’

      ‘Yes? I’m still here.’

      ‘Mam, what does it feel like…’ Judy took a deep breath ‘… when you love somebody?’

      ‘We ll, now…’ Beth knew she would have to answer carefully if she was to keep the girl’s confidence. ‘It all depends, I suppose.’

      ‘What do you mean?’

      Beth took a moment to consolidate her thoughts, before saying, ‘What I mean is, there’s many kinds of love. There’s the love you feel for your family, and the love you have for a dear friend. And then there’s the other kind of love…’

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