The Hero’s Guide to Storming the Castle. Christopher Healy

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      “Well, whatever happens, these past few days have been quite enjoyable,” Frederic said. “You and I, dashing across the countryside together, holding secret meetings and such. Very exciting, no? Almost makes me wish it didn’t all have to end in a perilous prison break.”

      Ella was barely listening. “Look, Frederic, the others are no-shows. You and I have to do this alone.” She patted the sword hanging at her side and saw Frederic tremble slightly. “Take it easy, Frederic. We can—” A figure appeared suddenly between them as if erupting from the very air itself. Ella reacted on instinct, shoving Frederic out of the way and hauling off with a gut punch that knocked the intruder flat on his back.

      “Your messages have been delivered, sir, Your Highness, sir,” Smimf wheezed from the grass where he lay.

      “Oh, my goodness,” Ella exclaimed. “I’m so sorry!”

      “My fault,” Smimf said, holding his belly. “Got to learn not to startle people like that. I did it to my grandmother once, and she reacted the same way. Only she’s got a metal hand.”

      A second later, a dappled horse galloped out of the trees, with Duncan at the reins. “Oh, dear!” Duncan cried when he saw Frederic and Ella bent over the fallen messenger. “That boy ran so fast he melted, didn’t he?”

      “I’m fine, sir, Your Highness, sir,” Smimf said as Ella pulled him back to his feet.

      “Duncan!” Frederic shouted.

      “Frederic!” Duncan exclaimed. And promptly fell off his horse. He scrambled to his feet and enveloped Frederic in a hug.

      “It’s so good to see you,” Frederic said.

      “Likewise,” Duncan replied. “You’re exactly how I remember you. But in different clothes.”

      “Thank you for coming, Duncan,” Ella said.

      “Oh, I’d do anything for my friends,” Duncan said with a goofy grin. “Um, what are we doing again?”

      Ella pointed to a large wall just outside the trees that was decorated with huge mosaic rainbows. “We have to break into that palace garden before Briar Rose marries Liam,” she said.

      “Weddings always make me cry,” Duncan said.

      “Duncan, we’re not here to see the wedding,” Frederic said. “We’re here to stop it.”

      Duncan shrugged. “I still might cry.”

      “Oh, by the way, sir, Your Highness, sir,” Smimf said. “Prince Gustav told me to tell you that he would be here as well.”

      “Timely news delivery, Short-Pants,” Gustav said as he rode up on his warhorse. The brawny prince’s armor clattered as he jumped to the ground. “So when do we get to fight?”

      Duncan rushed in for a hug, but Gustav sidestepped, allowing his friend to face-plant into a nearby tree. Feeling slightly bad about this, Gustav treated Duncan to a pat on the head. Duncan was satisfied.

      “Hey, Mr. Mini-Cape, I see you’ve got yourself a ride this time,” Gustav said, noticing Duncan’s horse.

      “Ah, yes,” Duncan said. “Allow me to introduce Papa Scoots Jr. As you surely remember, the original Papa Scoots ran away last year. I thought I’d never have a horse like that again. But as luck would have it, one autumn morning, this fine beast wandered into Papa Scoots’s old stable. To make it even more of a coincidence, he looks exactly like Papa Scoots! So I had to name him Papa Scoots Jr. It’s like fate.”

      “Um, Duncan,” Frederic said tentatively. “Did you ever consider that maybe Papa Scoots just found his way back home? That this is Papa Scoots?”

      “Impossible,” Duncan said. “Papa Scoots hated me.” And with that, Papa Scoots Jr. kicked Duncan into a bush.

      “All right, we’ve got business to attend to,” Gustav said. “Enough horsing around.”

      Frederic chuckled. “That was funny, Gustav.”

      Gustav frowned. “It wasn’t meant to be. What are we waiting for? I heard you guys say the wedding was going to start any minute now. How do we get in?”

      “Well, for that we need one more person,” Frederic said. A rustling rose from some nearby shrubbery. “I hope that’s her now.”

      Lila struggled between two bushes, snagging her very expensive-looking magenta gown on several branches as she did (not that it seemed to bother her at all). “Hey, you’re all here,” the girl said happily.

      Lila, Liam’s tweenage sister, shared her bother’s coffee-toned complexion and green eyes. She had the sleeves of her gown rolled up, and her chestnut hair curled into tight ringlets that bounced like little springs when she walked. (The hairstyle was completely her mother’s idea.)

      Ella and Frederic introduced her to the other princes.

      “Lila has a way to sneak us into the wedding,” Frederic explained. “We knew that, as a member of the groom’s family, she would have an invitation. So we figured she’d be the perfect inside man—or girl—for this job.”

      “Happy to do it,” Lila said. “Follow me, everybody. We don’t have much time. The music has started, and the circus people are already performing.”

      “Circus people?” Frederic asked, suddenly looking as if someone had a sword pointed at his heart. “What circus?”

      “Oh, it’ll be a great diversion, actually,” Lila said. “Briar’s got some acrobats from the Flimsham Brothers Circus warming up the crowd for her.”

      “Flimsham?” Frederic gulped. He took a staggering step backward and gripped a nearby tree trunk for support. “I can’t go out there.”

      “Why not?” Ella asked.

      “El Stripo,” Frederic said.

      Ella, Gustav, and Duncan responded with a collective “Ahhh.” They’d all heard the story of how King Wilberforce used El Stripo—the Flimsham Brothers’ talented circus tiger—to terrify Frederic when he was a little boy. The experience of being engulfed by the mouth of a raging tiger (even a toothless one) had scarred him for life.

      “Don’t worry, Frederic. I’m sure that same tiger isn’t still with the circus,” Ella said. “Do tigers even live that long?”

      “Not when I’m around,” Gustav quipped.

      “Let’s work this out scientifically,” Duncan said, tapping a finger to his head. “A tiger is what you get when a cat and a zebra have a baby. Cats have an average lifespan of about ten years, while zebras get about twenty-five—”

      “Guys!” Lila said sharply. “Anyone who’s part of this rescue needs to come with me now.” She turned and began to head through the trees.

      “She’s right; let’s go,” Frederic said. He turned to Smimf. “I’ll pay you a bonus if you stay here and watch our horses.”

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