How to Make Anyone Fall in Love With You: 85 Proven Techniques for Success. Leil Lowndes

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       Chapter Nine

       Your First Body Language

       Let Your Body Do the Talking

      Science documents that early body language of both partners is crucial to whether love will develop or not. One of the most tireless researchers in the laboratory of love was Dr Timothy Perper, who spent more than 2,000 gruelling hours perched on stools of singles’ bars, scrutinizing men, women and their early courting moves.

      Like researchers tracking the mating habits of hamsters, Dr Perper spotted the identical courtship pattern repeatedly in his singles’ bar laboratory. Night after night he stayed resolutely at his post, scribbling notations, devising charts and hypothesizing formulae as men and women picked each other up. Then, in the finest scientific tradition, he broke the body language pattern of couples getting to know each other into five very specific steps.

      Dr Perper’s findings reveal that when both partners stuck to a precise sequence of moves, the couple wound up leaving together or making a date. However, if either partner broke the sequence – even accidentally – the couple drifted apart.

      Many people looking for love take lessons in social dancing hoping to meet a Potential Lover Partner. They painstakingly learn the steps to the foxtrot, the waltz, the cha-cha and the rhumba. But they fall flat on their faces in the most important dance of all, the one the good doctor dubbed the Dance of Intimacy.

      What are the steps to the Dance of Intimacy? They are as clear and as carefully choreographed as those of the Tennessee Waltz. They are the sequential movements you must make if intimacy is to develop with your PLP. Pay attention to each of the following five subconscious body language steps because, if you slip on any of them, your Quarry will lose interest and wander back into the singles’ jungle.

The Dance of Intimacy

      Step One: Non-verbal Signal After the two partners are within speaking range, one or the other makes his or her presence known (as described in the previous chapter) by a smile, a nod or a glance.

       Step Two: Talk

      One of the two then speaks. Perhaps he or she makes a comment or asks a question. Even a simple ‘Hi’ will do, but something verbal takes place.

       Step Three: Turning

      Now it gets interesting. When one partner throws out the verbal signal, the recipient must turn at least the head fully towards the speaker and acknowledge the comment receptively. If he or she does not, the Hunter seldom tries again.

      However, if the partner does turn warmly towards the speaker, they fall into conversation. Then a crucial pivoting takes place. Hunter and Quarry gradually switch from just their heads turned towards each other to their shoulders. If they like each other, their torsos soon turn, followed by their knees. Finally, in successful meetings, their whole bodies wind up facing each other.

      This head-to-head, belly-to-belly, knees-to-knees gradual sequence can take from minutes to hours. With each increasing turn, intimacy increases. With each turn away, intimacy decreases.

       Step Four: Touching

      Concomitant with talking and gradually turning towards each other comes a powerful aphrodisiac, touch. A slight brush of his hand while he passes you a pretzel, a light touch on your jacket as she whisks away a piece of thread. The touch is fleeting, almost imperceptible.

      How you respond to his or her first touch is a big factor in whether the interaction continues or not. If he or she brushes your jacket and you slightly stiffen your shoulders, your partner can subliminally interpret this as rejection – often wrongly. But it is too late.

      At this point in the progression, Dr Perper tells us, it becomes impossible to tell which is Hunter and which is Quarry. Once the initial touch has been executed, well received and even returned, the man and woman are on their way to becoming, at least for the duration of the evening, a couple.

      At about this point, yet another phenomenon takes place. Eye contact takes on a different character. As early as 1977 a researcher observed escalating eye contact in couples as they went from more formal eye contact to gazing. Their eyes gradually embarked on travels all over each other’s faces, hair, necks, shoulders and torsos.²¹ This is the visual voyage we talked about earlier.

       Step Five: Synchronization

      The СКАЧАТЬ