The Fussy Baby Book: Parenting your high-need child from birth to five. Martha Sears

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      Babywearing.

      The outside womb. Being nestled in the arms, against the chest, and near the parent’s face gives baby the most soothing of all environments. Mother’s walking motion “reminds” baby of the rhythm he enjoyed while in the womb. The sling encircles and contains the infant who would otherwise become agitated and waste energy flinging arms and legs around. The worn baby is only a breath away from the parent’s voice, the familiar sound he has grown to associate with feeling good. Babies settle better in this “live” environment than they do when parked in swings or plastic infant seats.

      Sights aplenty. Being up in arms gives baby a visual advantage. He now has a wider view of his world. Up near adult eye level, there are more visual attractions to distract baby from fussing.

      sucking to soothe

       Since babies start sucking while in the womb, they are born relating sucking to soothing. That is one reason why they are so eager to suck right after birth, whether they find a breast or their hands. They need soothing after their wild ride down the birth canal. Mothers intuitively offer sucking to a fussy baby, and it usually works like a charm.

      The distressed infant can now pick from a wide array of ever-changing scenery, select what delights him, and shut out what disturbs him. And seen from such a secure perch, even the disturbing sights soon become interesting rather than frightening. You don’t have to focus on bringing artificial sights to baby’s face. Just your going about your business and varying your movements and environment as you do is enough stimulation for most babies.

      Instant replay. The expanding mind of a growing infant is like a video library containing thousands of tapes. These tapes record behaviour patterns that baby has learned to anticipate as either soothing or disturbing. Babywearing mothers tell us, “As soon as I put on the sling, my baby’s face lights up with delight, and he stops fussing.” The scene of mother putting on the sling triggers a replay in baby’s mind of all the pleasant moments she’s experienced in mother’s arms, and she can anticipate the pleasant interaction that is soon to follow. She stops fussing. She’s no longer bored.

      Makes life easier for parents. Not only is babywearing good for the infant, it’s good for the mother as well. The carrier gives you a comforting tool that usually works. After baby gets used to being worn and you get used to wearing baby, you have more options and more mobility. You’ll feel as though you’ve gained an extra pair of hands, especially around the house, and you can go more places. Baby is content, since “home” to a tiny baby is being with mum, even though mum may be in the middle of a busy shopping centre or at a party full of adults.

      A baby who fusses less is more fun to be with and drains less energy from the parents. Infants and parents can then direct the energy they would have wasted on managing fussing into growing and interacting. That’s why carried babies thrive – as do their parents.

      Familiarity breeds content. Living in a carrier keeps infants content because it keeps them in constant contact with the familiar sounds, touches, movements, and visual delights of their parents. Being nestled in a familiar position is especially calming for the baby who is easily distracted and falls apart at the first sight of a strange person or a strange place. The worn baby is always surrounded by things he knows. From this secure base, the baby has less fear of the unfamiliar – and adjusts without a fuss.

      Proximity fosters calmness. A baby who is worn is in mother’s arms and literally right under her face. With this close proximity, mother can teach baby to cry “better”. As soon as baby gives a hint that he is about to fuss, mother, because she is right there, can pre-empt the cry or keep it from escalating into an all-out fit. Being close to your baby helps you learn to read your baby’s pre-cry signals so that you can intervene to meet baby’s needs before he has to fuss. Baby in turn learns to be more at ease using non-crying modes of signalling since, during baby-wearing, he has learned СКАЧАТЬ