The Eleven Comedies, Volume 2. Аристофан

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      BDELYCLEON. And what did he say to that?

      PHILOCLEON. Well, he pretended I had the stomach of a cock. "You have soon digested the money," he said with a laugh.

      BDELYCLEON. You see, that is yet another advantage.

      PHILOCLEON. And no small one either. Come, do as you will.

      BDELYCLEON. Wait! I will bring everything here.

      PHILOCLEON. You see, the oracles are coming true; I have heard it foretold, that one day the Athenians would dispense justice in their own houses, that each citizen would have himself a little tribunal constructed in his porch similar to the altars of Hecaté,86 and that there would be such before every door.

      BDELYCLEON. Hold! what do you say? I have brought you everything needful and much more into the bargain. See, here is an article, should you want to piss; it shall be hung beside you on a nail.

      PHILOCLEON. Good idea! Right useful at my age. You have found the true preventive of bladder troubles.

      BDELYCLEON. Here is fire, and near to it are lentils, should you want to take a snack.

      PHILOCLEON. 'Tis admirably arranged. For thus, even when feverish, I shall nevertheless receive my pay; and besides, I could eat my lentils without quitting my seat. But why this cock?

      BDELYCLEON. So that, should you doze during some pleading, he may awaken you by crowing up there.

      PHILOCLEON. I want only for one thing more; all the rest is as good as can be.

      BDELYCLEON. What is that?

      PHILOCLEON. If only they could bring me an image of the hero Lycus.87

      BDELYCLEON. Here it is! Why, you might think it was the god himself!

      PHILOCLEON. Oh! hero, my master! how repulsive you are to look at! 'Tis an exact portrait of Cleonymus!

      SOSIAS. That is why, hero though he be, he has no weapon.

      BDELYCLEON. The sooner you take your seat, the sooner I shall call a case.

      PHILOCLEON. Call it, for I have been seated ever so long.

      BDELYCLEON. Let us see. What case shall we bring up first? Is there a slave who has done something wrong? Ah! you Thracian there, who burnt the stew-pot t'other day.

      PHILOCLEON. Hold, hold! Here is a fine state of things! you had almost made me judge without a bar,88 and that is the thing of all others most sacred among us.

      BDELYCLEON. By Zeus! I had forgotten it, but I will run indoors and bring you one immediately. What is this after all, though, but mere force of habit!

      XANTHIAS. Plague take the brute! Can anyone keep such a dog?

      BDELYCLEON. Hullo! what's the matter?

      XANTHIAS. Why, 'tis Labes,89 who has just rushed into the kitchen and has seized a whole Sicilian cheese and gobbled it up.

      BDELYCLEON. Good! this will be the first offence I shall make my father try. (To Xanthias.) Come along and lay your accusation.

      XANTHIAS. No, not I; the other dog vows he will be accuser, if the matter is set down for trial.

      BDELYCLEON. Well then, bring them both along.

      XANTHIAS. I am coming.

      PHILOCLEON. What is this?

      BDELYCLEON. 'Tis the pig-trough90 of the swine dedicated to Hestia.

      PHILOCLEON. But it's sacrilege to bring it here.

      BDELYCLEON. No, no, by addressing Hestia first,91 I might, thanks to her, crush an adversary.

      PHILOCLEON. Put an end to delay by calling up the case. My verdict is already settled.

      BDELYCLEON. Wait! I must yet bring out the tablets92 and the scrolls.93

      PHILOCLEON. Oh! I am boiling, I am dying with impatience at your delays. I could have traced the sentence in the dust.

      BDELYCLEON. There you are.

      PHILOCLEON. Then call the case.

      BDELYCLEON. I am here.

      PHILOCLEON. Firstly, who is this?

      BDELYCLEON. Ah! my god! why, this is unbearable! I have forgotten the urns.

      PHILOCLEON. Well now! where are you off to?

      BDELYCLEON. To look for the urns.

      PHILOCLEON. Unnecessary, I shall use these vases.94

      BDELYCLEON. Very well, then we have all we need, except the clepsydra.

      PHILOCLEON. Well then! and this? what is it if not a clepsydra?95

      BDELYCLEON. True again! 'Tis calling things by their right name! Let fire be brought quickly from the house with myrtle boughs and incense, and let us invoke the gods before opening the sitting.

      CHORUS. Offer them libations and your vows and we will thank them that a noble agreement has put an end to your bickerings and strife.

      BDELYCLEON. And first let there be a sacred silence.

      CHORUS. Oh! god of Delphi! oh! Phoebus Apollo! convert into the greatest blessing for us all what is now happening before this house, and cure us of our error, oh, Paean,96 our helper!

      BDELYCLEON. Oh! Powerful god, Apollo Aguieus,97 who watchest at the door of my entrance hall, accept this fresh sacrifice; I offer it that you may deign to soften my father's excessive severity; he is as hard as iron, his heart is like sour wine; do thou pour into it a little honey. Let him become gentle like other men, let him take more interest in the accused than in the accusers, may he allow himself to be softened by entreaties; calm his acrid humour and deprive his irritable mind of all sting.

      CHORUS. We unite our vows and chants to those of this new magistrate.98 His words have won our favour and we are convinced that he loves the people more than any of the young men of the present day.

      BDELYCLEON. If there be any judge near at hand, let him enter; once the proceedings have opened, we shall admit him no more.99

      PHILOCLEON. Who is the defendant? Ha! what a sentence he will get!

      XANTHIAS (Prosecuting Council). Listen to the indictment. A dog of Cydathenea doth hereby charge Labes of Aexonia with having СКАЧАТЬ