Miracle Christmas. Shirley Jump

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СКАЧАТЬ Gabe shrugged.

      ‘Why don’t you go and keep him company? We’ll be another fifteen minutes or so,’ Beth suggested.

      Rilla’s pulse reverberated through her entire body, her heart banging against her ribs as if it was trying to escape her chest as she approached Bridie’s room. She was more nervous seeing him now than she had been the other morning at work with an audience of colleagues.

      She drew level with the doorway to the isolation room and stopped short. Luca was stroking Bridie’s head and murmuring to her in his native tongue, calling her his little bush bambina. He was looking at her with such compassion it sucked Rilla’s breath away.

      Was he thinking about their baby as he stroked Bridie’s downy wisps? As she was? Wondering how different it could have been had she managed to carry their baby to full term. As she was? Fantasising about dribbly smiles, early-morning cuddles and soft baby skin? As she was?

      Why had they let things go so cold between them?

      Bridie’s nurse spotted her in the doorway and told her to come in. Luca raised his head and she held her breath, unsure of what she would see in his eyes.

      ‘Hello, Rilla.’

      Rilla saw the same wariness she knew was reflected in her gaze. Did he regret their impulsiveness too? ‘You should have woken me, Luca,’ Rilla chided, as she walked to the other side of her niece’s cot.

      He was looking devastatingly casual in a polo shirt and jeans, and she wondered if they were the ones he’d been wearing last night. The ones she’d helped him out of.

      Luca watched her approach, trying to gauge her state of mind. He noticed she’d showered and changed her clothes. Her hair was still wet and pulled back into a sleek ponytail. A sudden memory of him brushing her newly washed hair for her on their honeymoon reared up at him and he looked down at Bridie, unprepared for the mix of emotions it evoked.

      ‘You were exhausted,’ he dismissed.

       She hadn’t been too exhausted to cross a line that had been decisively drawn seven years ago.

      Rilla also averted her gaze to her niece. Bridie was awake and looking around, her breathing tube and the brown tape holding it secure marring her cherubic features. Her tiny fingers grasped Luca’s forefinger and Rilla was pleased for the distraction.

      ‘Hello, sweetie,’ Rilla crooned at her niece, because it was easier to talk to her than to face Luca.

      After a few minutes of babbling to Bridie, aware of their pregnant silence, Rilla said, ‘Beth was saying she had a good night.’

      ‘Yes. They’re talking about extubating her tomorrow.’

      They made awkward small talk for the next ten minutes, talking to the nurse and to Bridie to avoid having to talk to each other.

      ‘We’re back,’ Beth announced, entering the room holding Gabe’s hand.

      Rilla envied her sister’s relationship. Gabe and Beth hadn’t been together that long either, but Bridie’s crisis had only strengthened their union. They were leaning on each other. Unlike them. First sign of a problem in their marriage and they’d fallen apart.

      ‘Why don’t you guys go and have lunch at the cafeteria?’ Beth suggested. ‘It’s a beautiful day and I bet you raced to the hospital without eating anything, Rilla.’

      It was true—she’d showered, changed and then bolted over. And she was starving. She chanced a glance at Luca. He shrugged and raised an eyebrow at her and she nodded. There were things that had to be said. Next week they’d be working together again and they couldn’t work as an effective team, crucial to emergency medicine, with last night dangling between them.

      Luca waited until they were seated at one of the shaded outside tables before he launched straight into the speech he’d been practising.

      ‘I’m sorry … about last night … It shouldn’t have happened,’ Luca said. ‘I take full responsibility. I should have shown more restraint.’ It was then he realised that he hadn’t even thought about contraception. Hell.

      ‘Don’t,’ Rilla said, holding up her hand and refusing to let him shoulder the blame. It was typical of Luca to want to protect her, but she was just as accountable. ‘I wanted it as much as you did.’

      ‘No.’ He shook his head vigorously. ‘You were tired. Your niece was ill. It was a … mistake.’

      Rilla felt strangely miffed by his critical summation of their spontaneous passion. She knew he was right, that their relationship didn’t need the complication, but as far as mistakes went, Rilla had made a few in her life and none of them had ever made her feel quite that good.

      She shrugged, trying to be nonchalant. Like she had head-banging sex against doors with men every day of the week. ‘People have sex with their exes all the time, Luca. I think it was probably inevitable. Now it’s out of our systems, we can get on with our lives. We’ve banished the lust demons, so to speak. Cleared the air.’

      ‘That was clearing the air?’ he asked incredulously. Seven years of denial had culminated in a hell of a climax and banished nothing. In fact, his libido, non-existent for years, had suddenly roared to life.

      How were they supposed to put their past behind them, work together after that? Maybe he should have thought his impulse to apply for the position at the General through a little better. Maybe he should have ignored the urge and stayed in the UK. But the divorce papers arriving out of the blue after seven years of silence had thrown him, and he hadn’t questioned the whim to return.

      Rilla blushed. OK, maybe that was simplifying it too much, considering her entire body still throbbed with his possession. Sitting opposite him now, his masculinity a potent aphrodisiac, she realised it had just whetted her appetite. Exacerbated the desire she’d kept a tight lid on for the last seven years.

      ‘I just think we should put last night in context. You said you came back for closure. I think we both got that last night. One last hurrah, so to speak. The important thing is we have to work together, Luca. I’ve worked hard to establish my career. I’m up for the NUM position and I can’t let anything derail my focus. Sign the papers, Luca. Let’s put an end to it so we can both move forward.’

      Rilla paused, proud of her rock-solid delivery. Inside she was quaking but she knew it had sounded succinct and confident. They could analyse last night until the cows came home. It was what they did from now on that mattered.

      ‘You’ve changed,’ Luca murmured. She was decisive. Taking the lead. Confident. Not the Rilla who had been happy just being part of them.

      Rilla shrugged. ‘I grew up, Luca. I had a miscarriage. We grew apart. You left.’

      Luca winced at her ruthless but concise summation of their downward spiral.

      ‘Did you expect to come back and find me pining for you?’

      Had he? Luca didn’t know. He would have been sorely disappointed if he had. She hadn’t even kept her wedding ring on. ‘I don’t know, Rilla.’

      Rilla searched his face for a sign of his real motives. For something to make СКАЧАТЬ