Abbie's Outlaw. Victoria Bylin

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СКАЧАТЬ I don’t want to be you! You’re weak and stupid!

      Shocked at herself, Susanna had fled to her room and beat her fists on her pillow. She felt as if she’d been taken over by a monster. When her mother had come upstairs carrying hot chocolate and saying she understood Susanna was angry about her “father’s” death, the monster had roared even louder. Who’s John Leaf? But the question had stayed on her tongue, burning like too much salt.

      How could she trust her mother to tell to the truth? Susanna had known since she was small that her mother had secrets. Sometimes she had bruises on her arms, and once she had come downstairs with a black eye and said she’d walked into a door. Had John Leaf hurt her mother like her so-called father had? Was that why her mother had left him? Or had he left them?

      Susanna shoved the broom hard. She couldn’t be like John Leaf. She liked puppies and stories about Clara Barton, and sometimes she imagined Huck Finn was her best friend. Even when Robbie acted like a brat, she put up with him. And when Amy Jessup made fun of the new girl at school, Susanna had sat with her at lunch. Surely John Leaf wouldn’t do those things, but she had to be sure. That’s why she had written him a letter and sent it to the last address in her pouch.

      “Sam?” Mr. Walker’s voice cut through her thoughts. “Take out the trash. It’s by the front door.”

      “Yes, sir.”

      As she raised her head, Susanna noticed a dark-skinned man peering into the barbershop as if he were looking for someone. He’d taken off his hat, revealing a head full of wiry gray hair and piercing eyes that made her nervous. When his gaze honed to her face, Susanna stared back.

      “Well, I’ll be darned,” he murmured.

      Mr. Walker loomed behind her. “What do you want, Silas?”

      “I’d like a word with your helper.”

      Susanna’s heart started to pound. “Who are you?”

      “My name is Silas Jones.”

      She knew that name from her research. John Leaf had left the Wyoming Territorial Prison with an ex-slave named Silas. Did this mean John Leaf was looking for her? She let her voice rise to its natural pitch. “Do you know my father?”

      The old man’s eyes turned into obsidian. “I do.”

      Mr. Walker stepped closer to the door and stared at her. “Just who are you?”

      Silas signaled her to keep quiet with a shake of his head, but she wanted to hear what the barber knew. “I’m sorry I lied, Mr. Walker, but I needed the job. My name is Susanna Windsor, and I’m looking for my father. His name is John Leaf.”

      “Get the hell out of my shop!”

      “But—”

      “Right now!” Mr. Walker grabbed the broom out of her hand and hurled it against the back wall. “You’re the devil’s spawn and a damn girl besides!”

      “But my things—”

      “Fetch ’em and get out of my sight! That bastard killed Ben’s boys in cold blood. And you, young lady, are a lyin’ piece of trash!”

      Heat rushed to Susanna’s cheeks. It was true she had lied, but she had also worked hard and Mr. Walker owed her four dollars. She was about to insist on her pay when Mr. Jones stepped into the barbershop and positioned himself in front of her.

      “There won’t be any more talk, Walker. The girl’s an innocent child, and I’m here to look after her.”

      Wide-eyed, Susanna watched as the barber hocked up a mouthful of spit and let it fly at Mr. Jones’s boot. The spittle marked the toe and dripped onto the floor, but the man ignored it. “Get your things, miss.”

      Susanna hurried to the back room to fetch her satchel, listening as Mr. Walker’s curses thickened the air. “Your kind always wants trouble,” he declared. “Wait till Ben hears about this!”

      Whatever doubts Susanna had about trusting Silas Jones disappeared at the mention of Ben Gantry. She knew in her bones that he’d lash out the way she had punched the pillow when she’d been mad at her mother. As she stuffed her clothing into her satchel, Susanna whispered a prayer.

      Please, God. Keep me safe.

      As soon as the doctor left and John was settled in his room, Abbie invited Beth to sit in the kitchen for a cup of tea. Considering the Reverend lived alone, the room had a surprising warmth. With copper pots hanging above the stove, a pie chest and a galvanized sink, the kitchen made Abbie feel at home. So did the wraparound porch and the white siding of a farmhouse. With four bedrooms upstairs, a water closet and a bathing room, the house was well suited to a family. Only the smell of tobacco belonged to John. Abbie loathed smoking, but his bad habits were his own business.

      As she measured tea leaves from a canister, she glanced at Beth who was seated at the table and holding a cold rag against her cheek. Her eyes held a glitter Abbie understood. The two women would be up until dawn, trading stories and helping each other be brave. They had already talked about Ed when Beth lowered the rag from her cheek and looked at Abbie with curiosity.

      “What brought you to Midas?” she asked.

      “John and I have business concerning my husband’s estate.” As she repeated the half-truth, Abbie realized Beth would hear Susanna’s name. “I have a daughter, too. She’s visiting a friend and then coming here.”

      She didn’t mention that the friend was a man named Silas in Wyoming. Abbie hated to shade the truth, but she couldn’t confide in Beth until she had a heart-to-heart with John. Whether he liked it or not, he’d have to accept Susanna as his flesh and blood, which meant Abbie needed to know more about the man he’d become.

      So far, she had learned that he liked his privacy. A few moments ago she had knocked on his door and opened it a crack to ask if he needed anything. He’d ordered her to keep out, which she planned to do. He could have all the privacy he wanted, except where Susanna was concerned. Abbie lifted her teacup. “Tell me about the Reverend.”

      Beth set her spoon on the place mat. “I don’t know him very well, but I’ll never forget the first time I went to church. I didn’t have anything decent to wear, just a red dress. I felt like a sideshow, but he smiled as if I belonged there.”

      Abbie knew that feeling. Johnny Leaf had made her feel smart and brave. After adding a dash of sugar to her tea, she glanced at Beth. “Has he been in Midas long?”

      “About three years, but people talk about his past all the time. If you want to know more, you should ask him.”

      But Abbie wasn’t interested in the past. Robert had tracked John for years, taunting her with ugly stories about her “lover.” It had started after Robert’s election to Congress. A conniver himself, he’d worried that Susanna’s natural father would blackmail him, and so he had hired a detective. Abbie shuddered at the memory of the night she had revealed John’s name. She could still smell the smoke from Robert’s cigarette and see the flaming tip. She had ugly scars from that night.

      As she sipped the tea, Abbie tasted sugar and a hint of orange. It took her back to having breakfast at her grandmother’s table. While downing СКАЧАТЬ