High Country Cop. Cynthia Thomason

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СКАЧАТЬ the ponytail that trailed down her back. And he tried most of all to forget the way he felt when she touched him, the way she made his senses tingle, his heartbeat race. Sure, he’d been just a kid, but what they’d had seemed so real. Until the day everything changed. Carter lay his head back against his office chair and closed his eyes. There was no fighting it today. He was going to remember all of it.

      Fourteen years earlier...

      “CARTER, I NEED TO talk to you.”

      Miranda hadn’t even come to the front door of his house. She’d stood outside in the yard until someone noticed her and told Carter she was there. He’d come out right away, reminded her that they were going to a movie later, but sure, if she wanted to talk now, that was okay with him.

      They’d sat on a bench in his mother’s yellow daisy garden. He’d taken her hand as he’d done since their second date, two years before. “You didn’t need to come all the way out here,” he said. “You could have called.”

      “No. This can’t be said over the phone.”

      That was the first inkling he’d had that something was wrong, that his life might be about to change forever. The summer sun was bright and warm, and their future had seemed so perfect that day. Carter was going off to college on a full football scholarship. Miranda was getting a job and staying home, waiting for him to return for vacations. He’d promised her that if she wanted to go to college when he graduated and they were married, they’d find a way. She wasn’t overjoyed with the decision but had agreed to wait.

      “I’ve made a decision,” she said.

      “Okay, but why so serious?”

      “I’m using part of the money from the paper mill to enroll in NC State. I requested a fast admission report, and I got it. I’m accepted for the fall term.”

      That damn money. From the moment his father had issued the check to the Jefferson family, it had felt like a barrier between him and Miranda. Not that Miranda’s mother didn’t deserve it. Warren Jefferson had died six months ago from a lung disease associated with his work around the chloride tanks at the paper mill Carter’s father owned. Warren had known the risks, signed a release of liability and taken the position because it paid more. Other men had done the same thing with no ill effects. But Warren had gotten sick, could no longer work, and the family had lived on disability for years. Raymond Cahill’s “blood money,” as Miranda called it, had avoided a long and costly lawsuit—and probably helped Raymond sleep at night.

      Carter tried to remain calm as Miranda gathered her thoughts for what she was about to say. This didn’t have to be bad news. He’d known Miranda wanted to go to college. Why shouldn’t she use some of the money to accomplish her goal? They could still make it work.

      “My mother is moving to Hickory to be near her sister,” Miranda said. “We’ve found her a condominium there where she’ll be comfortable.”

      “You’re moving?” Carter had said. It was only a couple of hours away, but the barrier kept growing.

      “Mama wants to leave Holly River,” Miranda said. “And the truth is, I do, too. It was okay when Daddy was still alive, but now... Both Mama and I need a fresh start away from the memories.” Her voice shook. “There has been so much grieving, and Mama doesn’t seem to be snapping out of it. She sits in a chair all day long just looking out a window. I think in some part of her mind she believes Daddy is coming home.

      “In her lucid moments, she’s bitter, Carter. She blames your father even though Daddy signed that release form. Legal papers don’t take away my mama’s sadness. She hates the Cahills. I know it doesn’t make sense...”

      Carter released her hand. He’d stared for long moments at the tree line at the perimeter of his mother’s garden where the apple orchard started. “I guess I understand that,” he’d finally said. “But Miranda, you know I’m not my father.” How many times had he said that over the years? He was so sick of apologizing for Raymond. “I suffered with you when your father died.”

      “I know that, but it’s not just Mama’s feelings about your family. Your father doesn’t approve of me, of us. You know it’s true. I’m a Jefferson from Liggett Mountain. You’re a Cahill. Your ancestors built this town.”

      Carter couldn’t deny the differences between them, but to him, the differences didn’t matter. “Do you think I give a darn about my father’s narrow-minded prejudice?”

      “I know you don’t, but the animosity is there, thick as mountain fog. It’s only going to get worse. What kind of a future could you and I build together if your daddy was constantly sabotaging us?”

      “I wouldn’t let him do that,” Carter had said.

      “I know you would try, but Carter, your father is a strong and determined man.” She paused, and he tried to think of something to counter what he’d known to be true. After a moment she said, “And Carter, this is a chance for me. I didn’t want to take money from your father from the beginning, but that check is giving my mama and me a new start. I need to get away from Holly River, the memories of my daddy’s illness. It’s so connected with your family, with...you. I can’t see any better use for it than as an investment in my future.”

      “Funny,” he’d snapped at her. “I thought I was your future.” She hadn’t said anything to that.

      “So, what are you saying, Miranda? You want us to break up?”

      “I think we need some time away from each other to let the feelings heal. I love you, but every time I look at you, I remember the way my family was torn apart. Maybe sometime if we want to try to make a go of it again...”

      “No.” He’d been hurting, and the hurt was quickly turning to anger. “I’m not going away to college hanging on to the memory of a girl who might want to see me again. This is it, Miranda. It’s either over or it isn’t, from this moment.” He’d taken a chance that day by calling her bluff, but he wasn’t going to give her an escape.

      She’d stood, moved away from the bench. “I’m sorry, Carter, but we’re not kids anymore. We have to face the reality of who we are, the responsibilities we have. I’m so grateful for everything you’ve meant to me, but...”

      “I get it, Miranda. It’s fine. Just go.”

      She’d gotten in her car and driven away.

      Carter remembered not eating or sleeping for days, but then he took an accounting of his life and made some changes. Two months after the breakup, he met Lainey Roberts at college. She was sweet and understanding, and he’d fallen hard for her. Maybe he wasn’t emotionally ready for that kind of commitment again, but he committed himself to Lainey anyway because that’s the kind of guy he’d always been—steady, faithful, needing to be needed by someone he could love. They made plans, decided to marry and have children. For a while his future seemed bright.

      And then he lost her, too, and Carter had to take another accounting of his life. This time he accepted that he wasn’t going to dive into another relationship again. He wouldn’t risk that kind of hurt a third time. He would dedicate himself to his work and living down the unsavory reputation Raymond Cahill had left in the town of Holly River when he died. It was enough for Carter.

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