The Lost Princes: Darius, Cassius and Monte. Raye Morgan

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СКАЧАТЬ brimming as she looked up into his face as though trying to find affirmation in his eyes.

      He couldn’t answer that for her, but he took her hands in his and held them while he looked down at her and wished he knew what to say to help her find comfort.

      She took in a shuddering breath, then said forcefully, holding his hands very tightly, “Yes. I know I did.” She closed her eyes, made a small hiccupping sound and started to cry.

      He pulled her into his arms, holding her, rocking her, murmuring sweet comforting things that didn’t really have any meaning. She calmed herself quickly and began to pull back away from him as though she were embarrassed. He let her go reluctantly. She felt very good in his arms.

      “Sorry,” she murmured, half smiling through her tears. “I don’t know what made me fall apart like that. It’s not like me to do that.”

      “You’re tired,” he said, and she nodded.

      He waited, giving her time, wondering when she was going to tell him her parents had died in the accident, but she calmed down and began to talk about a dog she had found when she was young.

      “And what about Sam?” he asked at last, to get her back on track.

      Now that she had unburdened herself this far, he felt as though she might as well get as much out in the open as she could bear. A catharsis of sorts.

      And she seemed to want to talk right now. There was a little couch in the room and they sat down side by side and she went on.

      “See, that’s the flip side of it,” she said. “The dark side, I guess. The better I did, the worse Sam seemed to do.” She tried to smile but her face didn’t seem to be working right at the moment. “The more I seemed to shine, the more Sam rejected that path. She became the rebel, the one who didn’t succeed, on purpose. She got tattoos against our father’s orders and got her nose pierced and ran around with losers.”

      “That sounds pretty typical. I’ve seen it before.”

      “I guess so.” She shrugged. “Funny, but I can see it so much more clearly now than I ever did then. I knew she resented me.” She looked up quickly and managed half a smile. “Don’t get me wrong. We shared a lot of good times, too. But the undercurrent was always resentment. I used to think if she would just try a little harder…But of course, she felt like I’d already taken all the love slots in the family. There was no room for her to be a success. I’d already filled that role. She had to find something else to be.”

      “That must have been hard on your parents.”

      “Oh, yes. But in some ways, they didn’t help matters. They weren’t shy about telling Sam what they thought of her.”

      “And comparing her to you?”

      “Yes, unfortunately. Which didn’t help our relationship as you can imagine.”

      “Of course.”

      “So Sam left home as soon as she could. By the time she showed up with Cici, she’d been mostly gone for years, off with some boyfriend or another and only coming back when she needed something. She broke our parents hearts time and time again. And then, suddenly, there she was with a baby in her arms. Of course, part of us was thrilled. A new member of the family. But at the same time, my parents were horrified. Where was Cici’s father? Had there been a wedding? I’m sure you can guess the answer to that one.”

      “I think I can.”

      “She was penitent at first. I think she’d been under a lot of stress trying to deal with a baby on her own. But once she got some good sleep and some good food, she quickly became defiant again. And when Mom tried to get her to make some realistic plans she had a tantrum.”

      “That was helpful.”

      “Yes. It was later that night that she told me who Cici’s father was. She came to my room to ask me to take care of Cici. She claimed she’d tried motherhood and it didn’t agree with her. So she was taking off.”

      “Just like that.”

      “Just like that.”

      “What did you say?”

      She turned to him. “What do you think I said? I got hysterical.” She threw up her hands. “I couldn’t take her baby. I…I refused and I yelled a lot. I told her either our parents would have to raise her…or we’d have to put her up for adoption.”

      “Ouch.”

      “Oh, yes. I said horrible things.” She looked at the sleeping baby. Was she looking at the situation any differently now? “Things I didn’t mean. But I was trying to get her to face reality. She had the responsibility. She couldn’t just shrug it off.”

      “And yet, somehow that is the way it worked out.”

      She nodded.

      “She took the keys to my mother’s car and drove off into the rainy night.”

      “And your parents went after her?”

      “Yes. And they found her quickly enough.”

      “And?”

      She flashed him a stiff smile. “There was an accident. And Cici became my problem.”

      He watched her, puzzled. Why not take that next step and tell him her parents had died in that accident, too? What was holding her back? It was a horrible thing and she was probably still reeling from the shock of it. But surely it would be better to open up about it, work through it, put it in some sort of context with her life. Until she did that, he was afraid she would have that look of tragedy deep in her eyes. And what he wanted most for her—wanted with a deep, aching need—was happiness.

      Chapter Eight

      CICI was fussy during the night and Ayme and David took turns walking her. That way, they both got enough sleep and in the morning they were actually feeling rather refreshed and ready to face another day.

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