A Mom for Matthew. Roz Fox Denny

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СКАЧАТЬ up, the boy made a series of toneless noises and flung his arms around his dad’s neck.

      Maybe Matthew’s attempt to vocalize his joy woke his grandmother. Or perhaps it was Zeke’s laughter as he hugged his son and they fell backward on the carpet. Something jolted Celia awake so fast she sat up and the book flew off her lap and hit Zeke in the head.

      “Goodness!” She hurried to inspect his head and retrieve her book. “I can’t believe I drifted off. What time is it? How long have you been home, Zeke?”

      “I just got here, Ma. It’s still early. You look flushed. Are you getting sick?” Zeke worried that she appeared thinner and less energetic than she had when he and Matthew had moved to Galveston. Zeke didn’t know what he would’ve done without Celia, then or now. He didn’t tell her often enough how much he appreciated her putting her life on hold to help him raise his special needs son.

      Zeke recognized her sacrifice. A lot of women Celia’s age launched second careers, or found second loves and a new lease on life. Was it unfair of him to depend on her? But when did he have time to make other arrangements? And what could he find that would be better? No one was going to love Matthew the way Celia did.

      His ever-present nightmare was Bonnie Burnham. The social worker had been assigned the first time Trixie sicced her lawyer on Zeke to get more money. Ms. Burnham had decided Matt ought to attend a preschool out of state. She claimed it would better prepare Matthew to enter The Texas School for the Deaf at age five. If Zeke agreed to that, then his mom could reclaim her life. He understood the advantages. But the facility was in Florida.

      “I could be coming down with whatever caused Matty’s latest ear infection.” Celia felt her face with both hands. “I think I’m fine. Just more tired than usual. I don’t know how you stay awake night after night when Matt’s ears flare up, and then go off to work. You tell me to sleep, but I worry. And I hate hearing Matty cry. Did you have any success with that Ms. Stafford, Zeke?”

      “No.” His hands were busy showing Matt how to build a barn. Matthew loved the farm-animal set he got for Christmas, but he hadn’t yet learned which logs were needed to build the old-style barn.

      “That’s too bad,” Celia said. “I hope Mr. Kemper doesn’t blame you.”

      “He didn’t say so. On the other hand, he ordered me to help with her salvage to speed things up.”

      “Oh, then that benefits your cause and hers. I’ll bet she’s happy to have an extra pair of hands. You said she was trying to raise an airplane by herself. This new breed of young women astound me. I can’t imagine anyone I grew up with doing that.”

      “I didn’t talk to Pace and get the order until after I’d left Grace at her hotel. She doesn’t know yet that I’m expected to hasten her journey. I doubt she’ll be any happier at the news than I am.” He pressed a hand on Matt’s and forced the busy child to pause for a moment. Zeke caught his eye and showed him exactly how to attach roof pieces to the skeleton of the barn.

      “I suppose you scowled at the poor girl all through dinner. Honey, may I remind you that every woman isn’t to blame for what Trixie Lee did to you.”

      Zeke grew stony at the mention of his ex-wife.

      As if sensing the tension swirling around him, Matthew whimpered, dropped his toys and crawled into his father’s lap. He buried his curly head against Zeke’s chest, and his thumb found its way into his mouth.

      The man enfolded the boy carefully and willed himself to relax. “Ma,” he said in a milder tone, “You’ve gotta stop imagining every woman I meet is a potential mom for Matthew. Do you need a break? Have I placed too many expectations on you for too long?”

      “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s just that I hate seeing you this bitter.” Celia swung her legs off the couch. She wafted a hand through her recently styled hair. The move caused her son to study her the way another man might.

      “It’s not so ridiculous,” Zeke muttered. “I’m not talking about me here, Ma. You inherited good genes. You could easily pass for a woman ten years younger.”

      “Hardly,” she shot back. Nevertheless, she couldn’t hide her pleasure. “This doesn’t sound like you, Zeke. I’ve never known you to be chatty. You’ve always been so…so…”

      “Selfish?” he supplied with a crooked grin.

      Celia swatted his arm. “Never. No one would think that, Zeke. When the bad-luck chips fell for Matty, you handled everything like a real man.”

      Now it was Zeke’s turn to flush. He ducked his head and felt the rasp of his afternoon beard against Matthew’s boyishly soft hair. “I am a man, Ma. Have been for long enough that I should’ve known better than to get involved with Trixie. It was my irresponsible—”

      “Trixie should’ve told you her brother’s kids had measles,” Celia broke in, “and that her doctor was concerned enough to warn her. She knew she’d never had them. She could’ve gotten the shot.”

      “Old ground,” Zeke responded, screwing up his face. “Tell me honestly, Ma, is keeping house for me and watching Matt every day getting you down? I tied you down when you were younger. You deserve to find a nice man who’ll treat you right. Here you insist I need a wife. Well, you have a right to male companionship that’s not your son.”

      Celia jumped up. “I had chances after you left home, Zeke. I could’ve gotten married if I’d wanted. I didn’t, and I don’t now. End of this silly discussion.”

      “Oh, it’s silly for me to suggest you might like a man in your life? But it’s perfectly okay for you to harp at me over any woman we meet that you decide would make me a good wife?”

      “Yes, for Matt’s sake. I saw over the years how hurt and angry you were about your father walking out on us—on you, Zeke. Matty’s more fragile. I worry—what if something happens to me?”

      Zeke’s eyes cut to his mother’s face. “Which brings me back to my original question. Are you sick? Is there something you’re not saying, Ma? I see you put a doctor’s appointment on the calendar for next week.”

      “My yearly checkup. But there is something I’ve never told you….” Biting her lip, she picked at her nail polish. “In the past I’ve had cancer scares. They’ve removed fibrous cysts from my breasts three times. It’s why I stopped smoking.”

      Zeke finally found his voice. “And…you have another of these cysts?”

      “A lump. Dr. Collins has ordered a biopsy, but not to worry—I arranged with Doris Smith next door to watch Matthew for that appointment and whatever else may be needed.”

      “Of course I’m worried,” Zeke snapped. “That has nothing to do with arranging a sitter for Matt. Why didn’t you tell me about your health problems when I phoned nearly four years ago asking for your help?”

      “Because, tough guy, in all of your twenty-six years, you’d never asked me for anything. I wanted to help you, Zeke. I wanted to feel needed. Dammit, I still do.”

      That rocked Zeke. Again he wrestled with the weight of what had surely been selfishness throughout the years of his hell-raising youth. He didn’t know how to put any of what he was feeling into words. He barely managed to muster a croak as his mom headed for the СКАЧАТЬ