Destination Chile. Katy Colins

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СКАЧАТЬ frowned at her.

      ‘Don’t give me that look! I’m not going to be going all A-List celeb and ping straight back but I am desperate to feel like my body is my own again. Plus, if I’m going to meet my five-year plan then I need to be getting trim for the big day.’

      ‘This big day that Mike knows nothing about,’ I teased, then let out a deep sigh. ‘It’s amazing to think that a few years ago we were both in such different places – and yet somehow exactly the same – as where we are now. What with you popping out sproglets and me…about to get engaged…’

      It took a few moments for this to click in.

      ‘Oh my God! What? You’re getting married!’ Marie’s squeals made a lone dog walker jump from the other side of the lake. My ring finger throbbed in memory of the torture it had been under as she mentioned the M word.

      ‘Shush! You’re going to wake Cole!’ I glanced down at her toddler son, wrapped up in blankets in his buggy. He remained fast asleep with just his pink nose and angel-bud lips peeking out of the many covers she had piled on him earlier.

      ‘Tell me everything!’ She’d stopped in her tracks and snatched up my hand to hunt for any sign of bling. ‘Wait – where’s the ring?’

      ‘Well, okay, so I’m not engaged yet. But I will be…’

      She stared at me, blank faced, as if I’d totally lost the plot. ‘You what?’

      I sighed and told her about the trip to Ikea, the unpacking, finding the ring and damaging the nerves in my finger from the force of trying to get it off before Ben caught me.

      ‘Wow, so what was it like?’

      ‘Dreamy.’ I hugged myself without realising it.

      ‘Better than the last one you got?’ She raised an eyebrow.

      I pulled myself together. ‘Yes, actually.’

      She nodded slowly, thinking of how to word the next question. ‘Are you ready to do all of that again? You know, with what happened last time?’ she eventually asked, leaving a whisper of breath hanging in the air.

      ‘Yeah, course. I mean, I think so.’ She gave me a look. I stared back. ‘I love Ben, and this time it already feels so different to how I felt with Alex. It’s like I’ve grown up and realised what’s actually important in a relationship. Plus, I just know myself so much better – I know what I want now. I am so different from old Georgia, it’s like I finally know who I am. At least, I think so. It has come as a bit of a surprise.’

      ‘You think so? Georgia, this is a big deal. You need to be sure.’ She paused. ‘I’m only asking because I was the one who saw how everything collapsed the last time. I never ever want that to happen to you again.’ She visibly shuddered.

      I stuck my chest out. ‘It won’t. Ben loves me, and he obviously thinks we’re ready for this otherwise he wouldn’t have gone to the trouble of buying the ring –’

      ‘I just worry about you that’s all.’

      I looked down at her swollen tummy. ‘Well, that makes two of us.’

      ‘You know I love Ben, and I think it’s great that you’re living together, but don’t you want to, I don’t know, just enjoy that part rather than dive headfirst into the crazy world of weddings?’ She must have caught my expression as she hastily added, ‘I’m thrilled for you – well I will be when it actually happens – it’s just I don’t want you to feel like you’re being rushed into big decisions all because you’ve seen a lovely shiny ring.’

      ‘He does have very good taste in jewellery,’ I mused. ‘I’m joking – it’s not just about the ring. I understand what you’re saying, it was a shock for me too. Of course, someday I could see us taking that big step, I just hadn’t realised that Ben’s someday was now.’

      ‘I also think you need to consider how this might affect Lonely Hearts, how your team will feel working for a husband and wife and the marital dramas that could spill over into your business decisions…’

      I’d spoken to Marie many a time about how even though business-wise we were as thick as thieves, in terms of our relationship I sometimes struggled making it less about work and more about us. It was a hard balance made even harder when Ben was the type of person who kept his cards close to his chest, especially where his family were concerned. I still hadn’t even met any of the Stevens clan, something that would surely have to change before our big day.

      I blew on my fingertips for warmth. A puff of breath, like smoke from a Heston Blumenthal recipe, escaped. ‘I guess it’s something we need to consider. I know we’re both focused on making sure we don’t only talk about work but it’s easier said than done, especially with him being so keen on us expanding to London.’

      ‘You not a fan of cockneys?’

      I laughed. ‘It’s not that! It’s nothing against London or Londoners, it’s just a big decision and one I don’t think we’re ready for just yet. Yes, it could bring about a lot of money and new opportunities, but as much as the business is growing and making a healthy profit with the Manchester store, I don’t know if it would pay off taking on the stress and risk of having another venue in another city. Ben’s a dreamer, and he’s adamant it will work, whereas I’m trying to be more rational before making a call on it. It’s been hard recently, as this is the one area we don’t see eye to eye on.’

      ‘Bigger doesn’t always mean better,’ she said, then clapped her hand to her mouth. ‘Unless you’re pregnant!’

      ‘Yeah.’ I smiled and shook my head, also thinking about the gigantic dining-room table that had taken over our flat. ‘I don’t know. This London move is one decision, and a blooming big one at that, where we’re not singing from the same hymn sheet.’

      ‘I don’t know what the hell that means, but it sounds like you’re not exactly ready to be getting married to Ben if you can’t even agree on the direction you take your business.’ She raised her eyebrows and pulled her coat tighter. ‘It sounds to me like you need a plan. I know how much you love them!’

      ‘What, a plan to get my boyfriend to open up more and convince him the London move is not a good idea, well not any time soon anyway?’

      Marie shrugged. ‘Maybe you need to get away from things for a bit? I don’t know, take a holiday or something before you make any big decisions on London or on your future as a couple. That way you can get out of Manchester and maybe by having a change of scene it will be easier for you to talk about where you’re going with this, and decide whether you’re ready to commit to him for ever and make lots of model good-looking babies?’

      I scoffed. ‘I’ll leave the baby making to you for the time being. Although a holiday on some exotic, sun-drenched beach sounds idyllic right now.’ I nodded at the pathetic and unloved playground we’d made our way towards. A chipped and forlorn swing set wafted in the cold breeze; thankfully Cole was still in the land of nod, saving us from spending longer than needed in this depressing place. Is there anything sadder than a children’s play area without children playing in it? In the dull grey light, it seemed even more unloved, especially when framed by the lake with empty crisp packets and cans of Stella bobbing on the surface of the murky waters.

      ‘Hmm. СКАЧАТЬ