The Complete Fab Confessions of Georgia Nicolson: Books 1-10. Louise Rennison

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СКАЧАТЬ looked a bit puzzled (who wouldn’t?) but she kept coming nearer and suddenly with a yell I grabbed her arm and twisted it right up her back. I don’t know how. But I was doing it for the little people everywhere (I don’t mean dwarfs – I just mean, you know, vulnerable people).

      8:00 p.m.

      Jas phoned. “Everyone is talking about you – it’s brilliant!!”

      8:30 p.m.

      I am cock of the walk. (I don’t know what the girl equivalent of “cock” is... surely it can’t be “vagina”. I am vagina of the walk doesn’t have the same ring to it, somehow...)

      Midnight

      Yesssss!!!!!

      Saturday June 19th

      9:00 a.m.

      The Stiff Dylans are playing at The Market Place. Tom and Jas are going, and all the gang. Shall I?

      11:30 a.m.

      Mum is being ridiculous – she refuses to let me dye my hair blonde. I said, “Where would Marilyn Monroe have been if Mrs Monroe had said, ‘No, Marilyn, you’ll ruin your hair’?”

      Mum said, “Don’t be ridiculous.”

      But I went on, “And what about Caprice?... Do you suppose Mrs Caprice said—”

      Mum threw her slipper at me. Oh great, now she has turned to violence. I may yet ring Esther Rantzen’s childline.

      2:00 p.m.

      Nngut naface-musk on, I cnt muv mi face.

      2:30 p.m.

      Blocked the sink with my egg-yolk mask.

      4:00 p.m.

      I’m going to start my make-up now.

      4:30 p.m.

      Double merde. I’ll have to start all over again, I’ve stuck the mascara brush in my eye. It’s all watery and red.

      5:30 p.m.

      Lying down with cucumber slices on my eyes to take down the swelling.

      5:50 p.m.

      Libby crept in and ate one of my cucumber slices. It gave me a terrible shock to see her face looming over me when I wasn’t expecting it.

      6:00 p.m.

      Ellen rang, we are meeting outside The Market Place at eight thirty.

      Midnight

      What an unbelievably BRILLIANT night. Double cool with knobs. Robbie KISSED me. The Sex God has landed. It was so mega.

      The Stiff Dylans played some great music and Jas, Tom, Leo, Ellen and me worked out these funny dance routines. Lindsay was there, all po-faced. Robbie was great in the band. I felt a bit self-conscious about dancing at first but then I began to enjoy myself. I showed Tom and Jas a little routine I had made up in my bedroom – and then it was like in a film because everyone – loads of people – started copying it and joining in.

      I was a bit out of breath at the end and hot, so when the band took a break I went outside the back door. There was this sort of patio area. As I was standing there Robbie came out... I felt really awkward and was going to go back in when he put his arm on mine and said, “Can I just speak to you for a minute, Georgia?”

      I said, “Yes, fine...” He looked a bit embarrassed so I said, “Look, if it’s about Jas and Tom I’m sorry that you were angry with me... I think he’s really nice and Jas likes him a lot.”

      Robbie said, “Well, I’m glad, but it’s not that. I’ve just been meaning to give you this.” Then he kissed me!!!! I went completely jelloid – it was like being part girl, part jellyfish. It was mega brilliant. Twenty out of ten type kissing. I got all that stuff you’re supposed to have – fireworks whooshing in your head, bands playing, sea crashing in and out... I don’t know how long it went on for, I was so faint.

      Eventually he said, “I’ve wanted to do that for a long time, but I know it’s wrong.”

      I could hardly speak, it came out all mad. “Ng ng –’s OK, not wrong, no wrong, ngng ng – I mean it’s, I, what I, you and, always, even when I ng.” He looked at me as if I was talking a foreign language. But I wasn’t, I was just talking rubbish.

      Then one of the lads in the band came out and Robbie sort of leaped away from me like a leaping thing. Then he went back in, saying to me, “OK, so Georgia, will you pass that on to Tom? See you later.”

      “See you later?” What does that mean? Here we go again!!!

      I told Jas and she said, “What’s going to happen now? Are you his bit on the side? What does he mean, ‘See you later’? Does he mean see you later or see you later?” I had to stick my hand over her mouth to shut her up. When Robbie took the stage again I had to stop myself gazing at him like an idiot. He was so gorgeous and he had kissed me!!

      When the gig was over Robbie passed by me and said, “I’ll call you.” Then he went over to Lindsay. She put her arms round his neck and I couldn’t watch any more.

      When will he call me?

      Angus was in my bed when I got home, and Libby. I had to sleep in a sort of S-shape with my feet hanging out of the bed. But I don’t care!!!!

      Tuesday June 22nd

      5:10 p.m.

      I don’t know if it’s me or the weather but I am so hot all the time.

      No call for three days.

      Wednesday June 23rd

      11:00 p.m.

      No call today.

      Thursday June 24th

      6:00 p.m.

      Phoned Jas.

      “He’s not called yet.”

      Jas said, “Look, leave it with me. I’ll try to find out something from Tom.”

      “Will you do it subtly though, Jas?”

      She said, “What do you take me for? I know what’s subtle.”

      And I said, “Well, I’m sorry, but I feel a bit sensitive and I don’t want anyone to know about it until I know what is going on myself.”

      She said, “Look, relax, my middle name is ‘cool’.”

      I said, “Is it? I thought it was Pollyanna.”

      She said, “Well, it is, my mum liked the film, but that’s СКАЧАТЬ