Название: Hikki and Meteocrap
Автор: Tatiana Oliva Morales
Издательство: Издательские решения
Жанр: Юмор: прочее
isbn: 9785449882776
isbn:
Tatiana Oliva Morales
Cover designer Tatiana Oliva Morales
© Tatiana Oliva Morales, 2020
© Tatiana Oliva Morales, cover design, 2020
ISBN 978-5-4498-8277-6
Created with Ridero smart publishing system
Part 1. Meteocrap-3030
In 3028, a meteorite fell to Earth. It was the one that, according to official sources, brought to the planet a terrible «gift», which was later given the name meteovirus-3030, popularly called Meteocrap.
The virus carried with it the threat of annihilation of the whole of humanity, acting, however, very selectively, in the sense that it clearly worsened and even killed or, on the contrary, improved some people, endowing with not typical previously positive human qualities, and in the meantime it completely ignored some persons.
Well, what it even means, it ignored. Of course, they were carriers of that infection, but at the same time they did not have any symptoms, nevertheless being dangerous to others. For that very reason, they were assigned along with the infected patients to special reservations, unless they were caught.
– And how exactly did that virus affect humanity? – you may ask me a perfectly reasonable question.
Well, it influenced everyone differently. Judge for yourself. In our house there lived, a very greedy and rude man – nothing more than a pig. So, under the influence of this viral crap he mutated into a swine, after which he was placed in a special ghetto for viral mutants.
And here is another case. In a neighboring house there lived a teacher of elementary grades – the woman was the kindest soul, though she was poor. The teacher’s salary wouldn’t exactly buy her a lot, what’s true is true. Nevertheless, she always gave alms to the poor at the church, and helped everyone around.
She also mutated, got supernormal abilities from the virus, made an important scientific discovery, after which she received the Nobel Prize with the other regalia in addition, and moved to live in a suburban mansion.
Spacesuits
It was 3030, there was a late hot spring outside, and there was practically no soul in sight in the streets – at times, here and there appeared a couple of people in spacesuits or a lady taking the dog out for a walk, and that’s it. Well, what’s the point of wearing a spacesuit in this heat? It’s cooler at home and special uniforms are not required there.
– Why did they go outside in spacesuits?» – you may ask.
Since the law obliged them to that. Self-isolation and spacesuits were imosed because of the meteovirus crap all over the world. The fine was supposed for walking outside without a spacesuit.
By the way, the spacesuits were not imposed immediately, at first they had made do with masks and gloves for a whole year. However, such a half measure was clearly not enough, because more and more people got infected.
Clear business, people did not like walkung in spacesuits. And what were they to do? The law is the law, and a fine is a fine – if you want it to get paid, walk without a spacesuit, but be ready to lose twenty bucks for such a hooliganism, on giving them to the state treasury.
Oh, how many different rumors were there among ordinary people about that Meteocrap. It is only possible to be amazed, marveling at the variety of versions, by what people invented themselves. Judge for yourself.
Hikki Komori
One Friday morning, Hickki Komori went, as always, to take out the trash. Oh, no, sure, he went out later, but first, naturally, he had put on the spacesuit. And afterwards, when he had already taken out the garbage, he sat down at the table and composed the following verse:
Гуляя к мусорному баку,
Я думу думал так свою:
Что нужно б выгулять собаку,
А после в магазин пойду.
Скопились люди у помойки
И, обсуждая карантин,
Один товарищ да с размаху
Другому в ухо угодил,
Так как идей не разделял тот
По поводу и в части, де
Метеовирусной заразы
Не существует на Земле.
А коль её не существует,
Зачем в скафандре ходишь вот,
Безскафандрических пугая,
И стариков всех, идиот?
Here I must somewhat clarify the situation described above. The fact is that over the two years of the existence of that viral crap on Earth, the opinions of earthlings were divided like this.
Someone believed that the infection existed and had flown in a meteorite; someone believed that the crap had been specially developed in a secret military laboratory, and then put into action in order to minimize the world’s population.
Others believed that it had been fictionalised by the International Government to conceal some major economic and political frauds. Well, so many men, so many minds, in fact.
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