Book Club Reads: 3-Book Collection: Yesterday’s Sun, The Sea Sisters, Someone to Watch Over Me. Amanda Brooke

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СКАЧАТЬ spent more than enough years eroding my self-confidence. I just didn’t believe I could fend for myself and, more importantly, provide for Paul.’

      ‘And the moondial showed you that you could?’ Holly asked.

      ‘No, the moondial showed me what would happen if I didn’t.’ Jocelyn paused, still trembling with fear. ‘To cut a long story short, I saw a future where I hadn’t been able to endure any more of Harry’s mental and physical torture. I took my own life, Holly. It was the ultimate act of selfishness, not least because, without me to deride and humiliate, Paul became Harry’s new target.’

      Despite the horror of the story Jocelyn was revealing, a story that had been played out in this very house, Holly felt her heart lighten. ‘So you can change the future that the moondial shows you?’ Holly was aware that she was repeating herself, but she had seen a flicker of hope and she needed to hold onto it.

      ‘It’s not easy; everything comes at a price.’

      Holly shook her head, dismissing Jocelyn’s warning. ‘I’d do anything to change what I saw. In my vision, I walked into this house and had to watch Tom suffering so much, grieving for me. The worst part about it was that I was standing there, right in front of him, and he couldn’t see me. The thought of him looking straight through me still sends a shudder down my spine.’

      ‘Ah, reflection is the key, remember. That’s how the moondial works. The light from the sun is reflected onto the surface of the moon and it’s this borrowed light that is reflected further into the future through the moondial. But you are a reflection, you’re not really there.’

      ‘So that’s why Tom can’t see me. But I still don’t understand – because Libby could see me, I’m sure of it.’

      ‘Libby? Is she the baby you had?’

      ‘Oh, Jocelyn, she’s beautiful. You should see her. In fact you already have, she’s the baby I based my sculpture on,’ added Holly proudly.

      Jocelyn smiled. ‘Then yes, she is beautiful. Holly, I wish I could explain why she could see you but I don’t know everything. Even Charles Hardmonton never understood exactly how it worked.’

      ‘He was the explorer I read about, wasn’t he? So he did make the moondial from the Moon Stone.’

      Jocelyn nodded. ‘I know your presence will be stronger when you’re in direct moonlight, but I think sometimes it doesn’t matter how strong the reflection is, people will refuse to see what’s right in front of them. An adult in particular can’t accept what shouldn’t be there, but a child just might.’

      ‘Did Paul see you?’

      Jocelyn shook her head. ‘He was older and very, very angry.’

      ‘Because you abandoned him?’

      It was Jocelyn’s turn to stifle a sob. ‘He was right to hate me; still is.’

      ‘Why should he still hate you? You saved him, didn’t you?’

      ‘It’s complicated. There’s so much more you need to know about the moondial and its rules.’ The tears were flowing freely down Jocelyn’s face.

      In a reversal of roles, it was now Holly who was comforting Jocelyn. She went to the cupboard and fetched her a tissue. ‘Right,’ Holly said, ‘I’m all ears. Tell me everything. Tell me everything I need to do to change things.’

      ‘There’s just so much. Where to begin?’ Jocelyn said, almost to herself. She was staring down at the paper tissue in her hands, which she twisted furiously with trembling fingers. ‘There’s the journal, of course. It was given to me not long after Harry bought the dial and it explains as much as anyone has ever learnt about how it works. I haven’t looked at the journal for nearly thirty years, haven’t wanted to. When I left this house, I never wanted to see the dial again or anything to do with.’

      It was now Holly’s turn to reach out and steady Jocelyn’s shaking hand. ‘I need to know. I have a five-year plan to keep, remember? How can I become a mum if I don’t live long enough to even hold my baby?’

      Holly’s tone was meant to be light-hearted to ease Jocelyn’s sobs, but it simply intensified them. Jocelyn looked up desperately into Holly’s face and shook her head in despair. ‘I’m sorry, Holly, I’m so sorry. I should have destroyed the dial or at least the mechanism. We weren’t meant to meddle with our futures, it’s too much of a burden.’

      ‘Please, don’t cry,’ soothed Holly, determined not to let the old lady’s fear invade her own thoughts. ‘We have each other now, we can each share the burden.’

      ‘I want to. Oh, Holly I want to help you, and I will,’ Jocelyn promised between heavy sobs.

      Holly stood up and hurried to Jocelyn, who was crumbling before her eyes. She put her arms around her, frightened that her friend might be on the verge of collapsing, or even worse.

      ‘It’s all right, Jocelyn. I understand, you don’t have to say any more. By my calculation, I’m due to conceive Libby at the end of December, so I’ve still got a good few months to get my head clear and decide, with your help, what I need to do.’

      Holly had spoken with a generosity that she didn’t feel. She wanted all the answers and she wanted them now, but she couldn’t put Jocelyn through any more pain, not today at least. Her words seemed to do the trick. Slowly, Jocelyn’s sobs started to subside and her body relaxed a little.

      ‘I take it you haven’t told Tom?’ sniffed Jocelyn.

      ‘I couldn’t tell him before because I didn’t know what was really happening and I didn’t want him to worry. I still don’t think I can tell him, not yet at least, not while he’s travelling so much, not until I know everything I need to know.’

      ‘At least he’ll be home soon,’ Jocelyn said. ‘You just enjoy your time with Tom, and in the meantime I’ll dig out the journal. It’s in one of the storage boxes that I kept at my sister’s house – no room in my flat, you see. Lisa lives there now, so she can help me get to it.’

      ‘And then?’

      ‘And then, I promise we will talk. Only next time I won’t turn to jelly. I’m sorry, Holly, I feel like such a wimp, I’ve let you down. I thought I was made of sterner stuff.’

      ‘You haven’t let me down and you’re the strongest woman I know,’ smiled Holly. ‘And now I have you, this whole thing doesn’t seem so daunting any more.’

      ‘I’m glad. But please promise me you won’t do anything to try to change your future until we’ve talked things through.’

      ‘I promise,’ beamed Holly. ‘Well, nothing major anyway. There is just one thing I’d like to sort out.’ Holly picked up a carrier bag at the side of the table and pulled out a pink teddy bear. ‘Can you donate this to the next jumble sale? And make sure it doesn’t go to someone with a child under two. I’d hate it to get into the wrong hands.’

      ‘Do we have to go out?’ complained Tom. ‘I can see just as much of the outside world as I could possibly want from here.’

      Tom and Holly were standing in the middle of their new conservatory. The walls were still bare plaster СКАЧАТЬ