Anecdotes. Humor from Russia. Михаил Курсеев
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Название: Anecdotes. Humor from Russia
Автор: Михаил Курсеев
Издательство: Издательские решения
Жанр: Юмор: прочее
isbn: 9785449306487
isbn:
– Do you love your country?
– I do.
– Will you die for it?
– No.
– Why not?
– Who then will love the homeland?
***
A girl-friend tells her playmate:
– If you want your husband to buy you a fur coat, you should ask him about this during sex right along.
They meet again in some time:
– So, did you get your fur coat?
– No, and now no sex too.
***
A father, a mother and a son are driving back home after staying out.
The mother says:
– Sonny, do you know that she has two University degrees, helps her parents, a clever girl with a good position at work and dresses as a model, she doesn’t roam the clubs, doesn’t smoke, she is the bachelor’s wife. I don’t understand, why didn’t you like her?
– Yeah, mom, calm down, I liked her, she is good….
– Well, sonny, I don’t know who is still you want, that way you ain’t gonna marry ever! And you, daddy, why don’t you tell him something?
– What can I say, I didn’t see if she has tits also.
***
A daughter asks her mother:
– What kind of package do the men have?
– The men’s packages are of three types, my dear child: when a man is 20, his mancock is like a oak – firm and hard; when a man is between thirty and forty, it’s like a birch – it bends, but it’s steady-going; and when a man is over fifty – his package is like a Christmas tree.
– You said – Christmas tree?
– Yes. The roots are stone dead and the globes are just Christmas balls.
***
A wife asks a husband:
– Dear, my cell phone money dried up, may I use yours to call my female friend?
A husband: Sure thing!
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