Sherlock Holmes Mystery Magazine #1. Arthur Conan Doyle

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СКАЧАТЬ Hudson

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      Dear Mrs Hudson,

      My Labrador retriever Wellington has taken to sleeping in the bed next to me. He’s become so bossy about it, in fact, that my poor husband has to sleep on the couch these days. In fact, if poor Jacques tries to come anywhere near the bed, Wellie growls and snaps at him. What should I do about this?

      Snoozing in Sussex

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      Dear Snoozing,

      Yes, you certainly are. What on earth do you expect when you name a dog after a general who famously defeated Napoleon? Your dog is merely living up to his namesake by re-enacting the battle between England and France, attacking your poor hus­band, who has the misfortune to have a French name. Your hus­band may not be much of a man (as I strongly suspect, as he is allowing a Labrador retriever to intimidate him), but he de­serves his place beside you in bed. Give away the dog, if you must, but restore your poor beleaguered Jacques to his rightful place before he loses all of his self respect. And for god’s sake, tell the new owners to give the dog a new name! Votre servante, Mrs Hudson

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      Dear Mrs Hudson,

      I am frightfully sorry to bother you, but you see, my girl went and ran with my old school chum, Charlie. Not that he’s a bad sort, mind you; he’s a regular decent chap, I suppose; a bit of a prankster on the old rugby pitch, you know — he’s just a little fel­low, don’t you know, so he played scrum half, only he wasn’t that keen on it — rugger, I mean, so he was always a bit bulloxed. Good fun, really, at the parties afterward. Always had something amusing on his head — lampshades, a plate of salmon mouse, the fullback’s underwear. But I mean, sod it — what a rotter, to go and do something like that! I mean, it does really take a bit of cheek, doesn’t it, to go and pinch a fellow’s girl? The thing is, you see, I’d like to show I’m a good sport and all that by getting them a nice wedding present. Any suggestions?

      Stranded in Surrey

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      Dear Stranded,

      Have you considered cyanide? I believe there’s a sale on just now at Harrods. And for god’s sake, you sound like an upper class ponce. Try talking like a sensible, normal person and maybe your next lady friend won’t leave you for a scrum half.

      Cheerio,

      Mrs Hudson

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      Dear Mrs Hudson, Do onions store well in a root cellar over the winter? Wondering in Woolwich

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      Dear Wondering,

      Yes, they do. I am including my recipe for onion and wild mushroom tart, which is a great favourite of Mr Holmes and Dr Watson. Wild mushrooms are best, but store bought ones will do

      Sincerely,

      Mrs Hudson

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      MRS HUDSON’S WILD MUSHROOM TART

      Pastry dough 1 tablespoon unsalted butter 1 tablespoon vegetable oil

      3/4 lb mixed fresh wild mushrooms such as morels,

      oyster, and chanterelle, quartered lengthwise

      2 tablespoons finely chopped shallot

      1/2 cup finely chopped onion

      1 teaspoon chopped fresh thyme

      1 tablespoon fresh parsley

      3/4 teaspoon salt

      3/8 teaspoon black pepper

      1/2 cup crème fraîche

      1/2 cup heavy cream

      1 whole large egg

      1 large egg yolk

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      Special equipment: a 9-by-1-inch round fluted tart pan with a removable bottom; pie weights or raw rice

      Make shell:

      Roll out dough on a lightly floured surface with a lightly floured rolling pin into an 11-inch round and fit into tart pan, trimming excess dough. Chill until firm, about 30 minutes.

      Put oven rack in middle position and preheat oven to 375°F.

      Lightly prick bottom of shell all over with a fork, then line with foil and fill with pie weights. Bake until side is set and edge is pale golden, 18 to 20 minutes. Carefully remove foil and weights and bake shell until bottom is golden, 10 to 15 minutes more.

      Cool completely in pan on a rack, about 15 minutes.

      Make filling while shell bakes:

      Heat butter and oil in a 12-inch heavy skillet over moderately high heat until foam subsides, then sauté mushrooms, shallot, onion, thyme, parsley, 1/2 teaspoon salt, and 1/4 teaspoon pepper, stirring frequently, until mushrooms are tender and any liquid given off is evaporated, 8 to 10 minutes. Transfer to a bowl and cool to room temperature.

      Whisk together crème fraîche, heavy cream, whole egg, yolk, and remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/8 teaspoon pepper in a medium bowl until combined.

      Fill and bake tart:

      Reduce oven temperature to 325°F.

      Scatter mushrooms evenly in tart shell and pour custard over them. Bake tart in pan on a baking sheet until custard is just set and slightly puffed, 35 to 45 minutes.

      Cool tart in pan on rack at least 20 minutes, then remove side of pan. Serve tart warm or at room temperature.

      SHMM SPEAKS WITH RON GOULART

      Interview conducted by Carole Buggé

      Ron Goulart is one of the most prolific genre authors with more than 180 published works, including approximately fifty science fantasy novels and twenty mystery novels, including his popular series starring Groucho Marx as detective. His Harry Challenge stories are special favorites of this magazine’s editor, who has commissioned several new stories in the series. Twice nominated for the Mystery Writers of America’s Edgar award, Ron Goulart is an acknowledged expert on comic books and pulp magazines; his most recent book, just published, is Cheap Thrills, an Informal History of the Pulp Magazines. He and his wife Frances, who is also a writer, live in Ridgefield, Connecticut.

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      SHMM: Where were you born?

      Ron Goulart: In Berkeley, California. That was in January of 1933, just a couple of months before Roosevelt was inaugu­rated for the first of several terms as President. I grew up in a peaceful, pleasant neighborhood, even though it was on the wrong side of the tracks.

      SHMM: What did your parents do?

      RG: СКАЧАТЬ